Strange Love
by AkatsukiBoi
Summary: On a mission for Akatsuki, Kakuzu finds his newest partner insufferable. As conspiracies pop up everywhere, and sparks and kunai fly between them, he begins to realize that the little psycho Hidan might be the one he's been looking for all his life...
1. My Partner and I

Strange Love 1 – My Partner and I

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…

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Hidan flung himself to the side just in time; a long, thin pole of bamboo; sharp and jagged, zipped past him as it whistled in the air, and barely missed impaling him in the stomach. Grabbing hold of himself he scrunched together, becoming as small as possible to reduce the surface area where he could take damage, and took a brief moment to glance upwards at the man that was approaching him.

Step. By. Slow. Step.

On the ground, he could see that man coming closer, framed from behind by rays from the afternoon sun that peeked through the canopy. A tall man with a muscled, strong body, high cheek bones, a long, straight nose, and the most sensuous eyes he had seen in years. This man was his first and newest partner in crime, the S-class renegade ninja who went by the moniker Kakuzu.

Unbelievably Dangerous. Mouth wateringly sexy. And after his beautiful platinum blond head.

_Just perfect_, he thought, with the slightest hint of irritation. It was his first day on the job and he had already pissed this guy off so much that he was going to kill him. He smirked. Or at least try to.

He watched calmly as Kakuzu extended his hand from beneath his black, cloud emblazoned robes, reaching to one of the hundreds of shoots in this bamboo forest and easily snapped a branch from its base, launching it again with terrifying accuracy.

Hidan briefly entertained the idea of letting Kakuzu gut him a few times, to assuage his anger, but a quick mental checklist in his mind cleared up any doubts that the positives outweighed the negatives.

So he dodged once more, doing an awkward frog hop from his prone position on the floor, but his reflexes were a split second too slow, and the pole clipped his side, sending him tumbling back.

He clutched his stomach, his hand coming up red.

He looked back. The bamboo shoot had imbedded itself halfway into the boulder behind him. He let out a low whistle; that would have hurt like a bitch if it got him in the stomach. He'd be feeling it for at _least _a week.

"Hey, it was an accident! Accident! Mistake!" Hidan yelled, just as two more poles whistled past his face. Kakuzu plucked up more bamboo shoots and snapped them like twigs as he marched his way over to Hidan. "Fuck it! Not the face damnit, not the face!"

Didn't this idiot know how _long_ it took him to ready his hair in the morning?

Kakuzu ignored him, continuing his barrage.

"You're seriously starting to piss me off!"

The son of a bitch! Hidan rolled his eyes. He'd had enough of this. Since this was a new partnership, he had thought that he would give it a few days and see how things were. Testing the waters, per se. But he didn't think that a small mistake or two would set this guy into a murderous frenzy.

He had tried to be the better man. Had even attempted an apology of sorts. But no, this was Akatsuki, and every single goddamn ninja here had some spiked butt plug shoved up their ass since time immemorial.

He didn't _care_ anymore if he had to complete this mission flying solo and he didn't _care_ if he'd be punished; this idiot was going to die. He retracted his three-bladed scythe, licking the top edge. A bead of blood dripped down the red blade, glistening as it touched the light.

_Still sharp_, he thought with hint of morbid satisfaction, _good_.

…

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…

They had left the Akatsuki meeting place a little more than two hours ago. It had been a barren, dank little cave that was cold and moist, and not in any good way. It had smelled of mildew and bat guano, a horrible combination that had Hidan's breakfast rolling in his belly. With the enormous budget at Akatsuki's disposal, they could at least have shelled out the cash for a conference room. Heating optional. It's not like it would have bankrupted them.

He _supposed_ that it was a bit more secretive and hard to find, and there were most likely many organizations and individuals interested in peeking in and listening to the plans of a dangerous S-class organization like Akatsuki, but still, that didn't mean that he had to suffer this meeting without a clean restroom or proper heating.

It also didn't help that he was the last member to arrive, since the directions had come in a convoluted form, from a messenger who had contacted a messenger who had sent a bird with a note to him, that allowed him to contact a summons that indicated where to find a scroll that listed the location of the cave. It had not been a fun treasure hunt.

But now that he was here, his interest was piqued. One of these S-class renegade ninjas was going to be his brand new partner. In a way it nearly made him gag with laughter. Having a partner? What was this, kindergarten?

The man's name he had been told, was apparently Kakuzu. His previous partner had expired somehow for reasons he hadn't bothered asking. No one had thought to fill him in on the details either, but he wasn't especially worried. The precepts of Jashin prescribed that the weak were weak, and strong could do whatever the hell they wanted. And Hidan was definitely not weak.

He would normally have needed to prove himself by killing one of the existing members and then replacing him, but his case was special. Since this mystery misfortune had befallen Kakuzu's last partner, there was an exception being made just for him.

_D'awww_. How sweet.

He didn't fool himself. He knew what Akatsuki was; a powerful organization of S-class criminals that looked up to no one except themselves. They were each individually strong, independent, and didn't take any kind of shit from anyone.

By himself, he had found out where the leader was, and approached him. After a short little test where Hidan proved that he was more than capable of being an Akatsuki member, mainly by letting himself be a stick figure as various injuries were inflicted on him, the leader had strangely welcomed him into the group, even giving him a ceremonial Akatsuki ring.

Hidan's special abilities, especially his propensity to not die, interested the leader in more ways than he realized.

He met the other members as they shuffled around, waiting for the head honcho to arrive.

They all looked pathetic to him. Missing-nin from the five main villages didn't impress him at all. The five main villages were turning soft, with their demilitarizing countries. Missing-nin from _any _villages didn't impress him.

A grin crossed his face, a characteristic dimple dotting his bronzed skin as the first Akatsuki member approached him.

The man had appeared before him faster than the blink of an eye, shocking him when he realized he had been approached without him knowing. Hidan had been surprised, to his chagrin. He didn't like surprises much. Except presents. Those were always nice.

He knew he wasn't the slowest ninja, and he was actually very agile, as quick as any jounin, a result of vigorous training. But this man was on a different level when it came to speed. He was so fast he could probably take a piss without pulling down his pants. It didn't matter to him though, because he knew it wasn't only speed that determined superiority.

After all, no matter how fast he was, the man could never kill him. It was dark, so he narrowed his eyes for a better view. The man had deep, inset lines that fanned down his eyes, and black hair that framed his face. He was an Uchiha, though for jashin's sake he couldn't remember his first name. He had killed a few in his own time. They made very tenacious opponents, with their _sharingan _that could copy techniques.

The little Uchiha then asked him "So, you are the newest member?" in low, mocking tone, giving him a once-over from head to toe. Needless to say, Hidan gave him a once over too, but with much less enthusiasm. He was unimpressed with what he saw. He liked his men strong, not lean and lanky like this one.

Hidan laughed. The little Uchiha was arrogant too, a personality trait he despised in anyone but himself. He leaned close, and whispered beneath his breath, – "I am. You wanna try me out, bitch?" The Uchiha's eyes had widened at the display of disrespect, before narrowing angrily.

"…Guard you words carefully, here. Fools with loose lips have a tendency to disappear." The Uchiha boy said.

Hidan rolled his eyes. He wasn't impressed with concealed threats, either. He shot back, "you're pretty fast. Are you that fast in bed too?"

The air trembled as the Uchiha gathered an influx of chakra to himself. Now_ that_ was impressive. But the Uchiha boy was calmer than he expected, and he responded with words, not actions. "We shall settle this…later." He nodded his head in goodbye and flashed away quicker than he had appeared.

_Wow_, Hidan thought, he _was_ fast.

The Uchiha's partner had come after him. He was tall, sharky, looking man from Mist Village. Hidan spent a few good minutes staring dumbfounded at his mottled blue skin. Hadn't the man heard of moisturizer before? Or was that a birth defect, he wondered? For this man's sake he hoped so, because a swimming pool of the most expensive quality moisturizer wasn't going to help him. The razor sharp teeth had seemed suspect too, but Hidan guessed it was some sort of blood line. Or maybe he swam too much in some toxic waters as a kid. Hidan had heard that the Mist village wasn't known for being environmentally friendly.

It definitely wasn't known for resort spas.

"You've gotten on Itachi's bad side. Congratulations." The man said. "I'm Kisame, by the way."

"Thanks."

Kisame. And the other man's name had been Itachi, Hidan realized. It sounded faintly familiar. They exchanged a few more pleasantries, and Kisame walked away to find his partner

Then came an ugly old man that seemed to be made of wood – Hidan could tell it was a doll or at least something of that nature – shuffled over. "Hidan, was it?" He had said in this rasping voice. "I've heard about you."

Hidan sighed. If he met someone, he would say something friendly, like '_yo_', but it seemed a requirement of being Akatsuki was to whisper some dire warning as a greeting.

"And you are?"

"Sasori. Sasori of the Red Sand." The doll had told him slowly, grandly, each word drawling out over a ten second interval. As if he should have known and be impressed. Hidan gave a mock 'wow' and said, "I stand in awe."

Next up was a sarcastic blond with nature defying hair and what Hidan had thought was a lazy eye, but turned out to be a tiny mechanical eyeglass. His protector showed he was from the Rock village. "Ah. The newest member…yeah."

Hidan gave a smile-smirk. "Yup."

"I'm Deidara." Deidara leaned in and whispered conspiratorially in Hidan's ear. "Watch out for Sasori. Sometimes he get's…angry…yeah."

"Ooo…okay…I'll watch out…yeah." Hidan kept a serious face, but laughed when Deidara's face pinched back at the implied insult of his speech pattern.

The man with the double banana leafs wrapped around his head came next, then a cute but quiet girl, and finally the mysterious Kakuzu.

Even in the dim light of the cave, Hidan was impressed by what he saw. _All _of what he saw. Kakuzu was his type, strong, tall, and built in just the right places, with a silent, imposing personality. He exuded manliness and a tang of danger. Hidan smiled. He loved breaking down those types, and making them cry in the ground as he manhandled them onto the floor, grinding into them as they begged to die. Or begging for more.

He had a thick white cloth wrapped around the lower half of his face, and with the Akatsuki robe covering him; all Hidan saw was a pair of intimidating milk-white eyes drilling into him. Hidan felt an instant pull, an undercurrent of attraction, and finally a pang of disappointment one after the other as he realized that this Akatsuki probably didn't burn his candle at the other end.

All the members had gathered. Each of them was some sort of freak or had a weird eccentric personality, and Hidan wasn't sure he was too happy to be stuck in with them, but it wasn't as if he had any grounds he could judge them upon. He had his own issues. And he was also sure than some of his eccentricities were much more odd than anything anyone here had.

The introductions were the same to him, half-veiled threats and warnings not to step out of place. Don't do this, don't do that, don't step on my toes, don't make my coffee to hot, yadda yadda. Boring power jockeying and testosterone being bandied back and forth. Politics had never been Hidan's strong point.

They were strong he knew, every single damn one of them. He could even feel the chakra of sharky from the mist village, Kisame, emanating freely, too large to be contained, deep as the sea and dangerous enough to make a shiver crawl up his spine. But he wasn't intimidated.

What could they possibly do to him?

What could anyone possibly do to _him_?

After they had all gathered, the leader had appeared out of nowhere in a flash of fancy pyrokinetics, and introduced Hidan as the newest member, though the introduction was redundant, as everyone had probably already researched his background and then some. They probably even knew how he liked his eggs done. Sunny side up.

The leader continued, but he didn't mince words, and quickly gave missions to everyone. He also assigned Hidan to be Kakuzu's partner. He thought he saw the blondie with the weird mechanic eye giggle, but it was too dark to be sure.

He flipped him one just to be safe.

As the leader continued speaking, it appeared Akatsuki was planning something very important and Hidan arrived just in time to be smack dab in the middle of it.

"Dismissed." The Leader said at last, and then everyone left, leaving Hidan and Kakuzu alone.

After they had left the cave, neither Kakuzu nor Hidan said a word to each other. Kakuzu was exceedingly quiet, though he did squeak out the occasional condescending order of 'follow me'. It grated on Hidan's nerves that someone was bossing him around so easily, but this was the first day, and he wanted things to go smoothly today before he had a little _chat _with his new partner and they divvied up the responsibilities.

After all, first impressions were important.

About two hours of walking later, Kakuzu stopped and raised his hand, signaling for Hidan to come to a halt.

Hidan sighed in relief. The soles of his feet had begun to ache. But he knew the reason they stopped was not for his comfort. He had noticed something too – a slight whisper in the trees that had followed them for a while now, for about the last half hour or so. Quiet, almost unnoticeable.

But he wouldn't be in Akatsuki if he couldn't.

Suddenly, two ninjas – jounin, from the way they were dressed and the confidence they exuded even in the presence of Akatsuki members– ambushed them, apparently realizing they were spotted.

Hidan recognized their forehead protectors. They were from different villages, the Waterfall village and the Mist village. That was surprising. The Mist village had a poor reputation, and few villages would cooperate with them in any capacity, especially when it came to renegade ninjas? With another shock he realized that the Waterfall village was Kakuzu's village. This was going to be fun. Perhaps there was about to be some epic melodramatic showdown between the two. He was always ready to take in some drama.

Hidan tugged out his scythe, but another wave from Kakuzu stopped him.

"Well, well." Hidan said to Kakuzu, who was eyeing the two. "Seems like there are some people really angry at you…"

"To think someone would actually know where we are…there must have been a leak..." Kakuzu said more to himself.

Hidan rolled his eyes. Well _duh,_ that's what happens when meeting up is a tedious 10-step process.

"Who sent you here?" Kakuzu asked. Questions flashed through his mind. His analytical brain needing to find answers. Who, what, when, where, why.

For Hidan, his thought process was much, much simpler. It was a merely simple _how._

How was he going to sacrifice these two to his god?

The silence stretched, and Hidan was growing bored, tapping his foot against the ground like an irritated three-year old. "Who cares? Kill now, ask later. So much easier. There needs to be a policy on people ambushing us ya know, because I swear to jashin-sama that _I don't like being ambushed_."

Kakuzu had given him a look that said '_shut up or die'_. Hidan returned it with another look that said '_I don't care. Eat me'_, but he wasn't sure if the stoic ninja noticed or not.

Kakuzu spoke again, "...how did you find us?"

The enemy wasn't interesting in bantering, "That's not something a dead man should be concerned about."

Hidan laughed. "Hey, kid," he said to the ninja nearest them, the one from the waterfall village, "do you know who the _fuck_ you are talking to right now?"

One drew a kunai from his side while the other slowly peeled off a scroll from his chest pouch.

_Woot woot_, Hidan thought, at least someone was making a move. He hated battles where everyone just talked and talked and talked some more. If he wanted to listen to talking so much he'd go and watch a movie in his off time.

"Hmm…" Kakuzu rubbed his chin, remembering something. "…you are Iguro." He looked at the jounin with the knife then turned to the one that was quickly unrolling his scroll. "And you are Menma. Upper-level Jounin. Still chasing after me, are they? Don't you learn from your mistakes?"

Hidan was puzzled. "Huh?"

"Hunter-nin. They tried to take me a few months ago. They had more people with them that time. About six more. And I was alone." Kakuzu explained.

"And now _I'm_ here with you." Hidan thought aloud. "That more than triples your strength!"

Kakuzu shot him a withering glare before turning his attention back to the jounin. "They have a death wish."

"This must be a gift from Jashin." Hidan said, his eyes widening, reverent. He grasped his pendant in his hand and mumbled a quick prayer. "A banquet to god."

"So my new partner is a religious fool." Kakuzu was disgusted.

"And mine is an ignorant heathen." Hidan finished his prayer, a new fire burning in his blood at the prospect of a Jashin ritual sacrifice.

The shinobi ignored them; quickly preparing themselves for what they knew would be a vicious life or death battle.

"How do you know who they are?" Hidan asked, curious.

"They each have a 70 million ryo and 90 million ryo license for their live bodies. Half if dead." Kakuzu recited directly from his photographic memory. "One of them has a bloodline limit. The manipulatation of water pressure."

"Hmm. That's it?" Hidan said. He wanted to yawn already. Bloodline limits were interesting, but he'd killed enough bloodline users in his time and most were one trick gimmicks. They relied so much on whatever birthright they had that after that was defeated, they quickly fell with their shoddy skills.

It was surprising though that Kakuzu knew that little bit of information. Hidan himself had never bothered with the bingo book. He always left his enemies dead, and it wasn't as if he cared much for money. There were much more important things in life.

For example, the bliss of an untainted, pure death was more than worth its weight in gold.

Besides, that book was _thick_. You could practically use it as a bludgeoning weapon. Hidan hadn't even gotten past the page of contents before he tossed it aside.

"They'd probably die from shock if they knew my head bounty." Hidan smirked. In a way, he was proud of how much he would be worth on the black market for bodies.

"_You'd_ probably die from shock if you knew mine." Kakuzu responded with the faintest hint of superiority, and Hidan frowned, wondering just how much and if he was worth more.

The two ninja interrupted them. The one with the scroll, now a long katana in hand, spoke out. "Kakuzu, you are wanted for crimes committed against the Waterfall village and for assassinating a feudal lord. You die here today. I need only bring your body back as proof."

"That still doesn't tell me how you found me." Kakuzu laughed. "And you think you can kill me? Who do you think you are talking to, little boy? I've killed hundreds before you were born. _I _killed the elders of the Waterfall village, men much stronger than you'll ever be. If anything rested between those ears of yours, you'd turn around and run away as fast as you can with your tail between your feet."

"I'd still catch you," Hidan commented offhandedly, waving his scythe emptily in the air, "but a chase does sound fun."

The ninja responded by shifting his sword to his left. A line of water blasted out from the tip of the sword, and twirled around like a sentient snake. It whirled around him, creating a shield of water.

Oh. This was the bloodline ability. It wasn't very impressive after all.

"I'm going to bet my life on it, and on my name as the greatest nin-hunter of the Waterfall village!"

Hidan clapped his head with his head in disappointment. Did this guy even know what he was saying? Kids these days just couldn't pull off dramatic statements as well as they used to, if they ever did. Oh well.

"Looks like I'm gonna have to sacrifice them. Both of them."

Kakuzu's eyes shifted color, from a milky white to a deep black and his skin flashed dark. "Leave them alive. I need them for interrogation and the bounty. If you kill them, I kill you."

With a scream of praise to his god, Hidan rushed forward.

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…

A few minutes later, Hidan stood over the decapitated bodies of both ninja. The battle had been brief and violent. He hadn't even needed to switch forms.

A pity that these two had been weaker then they bragged about. If that was the greatest nin-hunter of the Waterfall village, the Waterfall village was in major trouble. Battle lust slowly left him, and something tickled him in the back of his mind as if he were forgetting something very important…

"_Oh shit_." He realized. He turned around to see a livid Kakuzu. His eyes were still pitch black. This time they simmered with anger.

"I warned you what would happen if you killed them. I warned you." Kakuzu reached out and snapped off a nearby bamboo shoot. "I can always get another partner that will obey me."

Hidan was speechless. The religion of Jashin stated that he had to kill everyone! It was sacred! In the edicts! It's not like he could have stopped anyways!

"Well, damn." He whispered as the bamboo shoot shot towards him.

…

…

…

Hidan leapt into the air, flying high as chakra enhanced his movements. He swung his arms, the muscles straining, and the scythe crashed into Kakuzu, who in the last minute blocked the sharp blade with his arms.

"Bingo!" Hidan cried, fully expecting to sever Kakuzu's arms off with a single stroke. What he didn't expect was when Kakuzu simply swat the scythe aside as if it were tin foil and take him by the throat. His scythe went flying wide, landing in a nearby bush.

_Ah shit_, Hidan thought. He didn't see this during the previous fight! He thought that the change of skin color only made him stronger, not impervious to weapons! He should have measured the others abilities first. He always forgot to do that.

"Surprised?" Kakuzu said, as he brought Hidan down to eye-level. "It's really too bad you couldn't stay. I could have enjoyed you longer."

"Goodbye."

Then he snapped Hidan's neck and Hidan fell limp.

With a sigh, Kakuzu tossed Hidan to the side, not enjoying the prospect of the cleanup that was going to follow or the explanation he was going to have to give at the next meeting. This was the fourth one he'd gone through. Maybe he should request to be without a partner. It would make any paperwork faster. His skin slowly began to revert to normal.

Something rustled behind – years of training and instinct screamed for Kakuzu to duck. He did, as Hidan's scythe cut a thin, crimson line across his cheek.

Hidan was alive. And he was mad.

"Surprised, fucker! I needed a good neck massage anyways!" Hidan screamed and cracked his neck for good measure, his spine straightening. He had been a bit surprised with Kakuzu. The man seemed the calm type, but he had a vicious ruthless killing intent. In the back of his mind, Hidan thought it was kind of sexy.

Kakuzu flipped backwards to stay out of the scythes range and his eyes widened. "I snapped your neck." He said, the words more of a question that a statement. "How are you still alive?"

"Well, I am _immortal _after all. Did you think you could escape holy punishment? Did you expect to raise a hand to a servant of Jashin without consequences?" Hidan bragged, enjoying the look of disbelief on Kakuzu's face. He licked his scythe where it had trailed a line of blood across Kakuzu's face, and smacked his lips at the coppery taste of blood. "I guess it's my turn to say good-bye now." Hidan taunted.

"Bye bye."

Before Kakuzu could come up with his next plan of action the dust twirled up around Hidan to reveal a blood colored pentagram. Hidan's body changed. It took the appearance of a black skeleton, his skin bone white with outlines the color of tar.

A crazed look appeared on his face, twisting his beautiful features into something primal. "You're already dead!" He spat.

Hidan savored the moment. It had been a while since he had sacrificed someone to Jashin-sama in a holy ritual. Far too long. With a cry, he removed a thin spear from his scythe and readied to impale himself by positioning the spear high above his rib cage, over his beating heart.

Kakuzu's eyes widened. He didn't know what was happening, but he knew he had to stop Hidan from doing whatever it was he was doing. He could sense it. Whatever the new man was doing, it was dangerous. His skin changed color again, signaling the hardening of his skin, and he leapt at Hidan.

"Too late." Hidan smiled and pierced his own chest as Kakuzu was still in midair. Hidan screamed out in a strange mix of pain and pleasure as the lance sunk into his heart, driving through the beating flesh and exiting through his back.

Kakuzu's body bowled over him. His eye's registered shock and he grabbed his chest. His other hand grabbed Hidan's free hand just as he fell still, his heart pierced forever by Hidan's technique.

Hidan let the feeling of pleasure subside. "Fuck you're heavy." Hidan said. He hadn't expected for Kakuzu to react so quickly. He remembered something else. "Shit! I forgot the mission info." He had let Kakuzu remember all the dreary details of what to do and who to kill.

Damn.

And he couldn't finish the Jashin ritual with a body over him. On another hand, he wanted too. Hidan had always taken pain for pleasure, and the spear through the heart was arousing to him in a way he couldn't begin to describe. Completing the ritual with a dead body sounded very kinky to him.

But…it was too…sacrilegious, he thought with a sigh of regret.

As he attempted to peel off Kakuzu's arm, he realized that Kakuzu's arms remained tight around his. "What the hell…" He wondered. _Is he still alive? Did I miss?_

Hidan put his cheek next to Kakuzu's chest, and listened. He froze and his eyes popped open. There was more beating…he counted…_four _more beating hearts from within him. The beating sounds were non-continous, as if it were a legion of horses galloping. "What the hell!" He said. He tried to pull away.

Kakuzu's other hand gripped his, forcing the scythe out of Hidan's hand. "You're not the only immortal here." Kakuzu said and leaned over Hidan. The two struggled, and the stronger Kakuzu pushing the two out of the pentagram limits. "Been a while since I lost a heart. Congratulations."

"Let go you fucker!" Hidan struggled to free himself, reaching out for his scythe.

Long tentacles of darkness burst free from Kakuzu's arm, entwining around his and held him in place. He watched in horror and morbid fascination as more strings burst free from _within_ Kakuzu's body.

"So the ritual is a technique that allows the summoner to exact the same damage on whoever's blood is used to summon the circle…huh." Kakuzu said to the bound and struggling Hidan beneath him. "And somehow you are immortal, which allows you to take circumvent dying along with the other. Fascinating."

Deep white eyes peered into Hidan's.

Hidan spit into Kakuzu's face. "So what? Almost got you didn't I? And you think I care! You can't kill me! Why don't you try, huh!" Hidan mocked. Kakuzu was a skilled ninja. To be able to analyze his ability so quickly and figure out the way to counter it was to push him out…Hidan struggled more, trying to get his hands together to cast a technique.

If he could just get back into the pentagram, just a breath away…

"...Ahh. I understand now." Kakuzu said, half to himself, half to Hidan, "The leader was getting tired of me killing all my partners…I just get mad so easily, you see." The truth dawned on him as he realized why he had been paired with Hidan.

Hidan's lightbulb also lit at the same time. His eyes shot open with rage, then narrowed as the question he had asked himself, why getting into Akatsuki seemed easier then it should have been, was answered. He cocked his head, wondering what the dangerous Akatsuki was up to. _Fuck!_, he thought, the freak had _four hearts_! Five hearts to be exact, since he had killed one, but Hidan didn't think Kakuzu would have been this formidable.

He was Akatsuki, after all.

Kakuzu grasped Hidan's fallen spear with a hand. Black strings creeping from his body had already fully entrapped Hidan. Kakuzu looked quizzically at the spear, and touched it as if he found a long lost friend. "This hurt. And I don't like pain that much. Not at all."

"And what the fuck do you plan on - " Hidan was cut off as Kakuzu ran the spear straight through his chest. And again. And again. And again.

"_My_ punishment." Kakuzu said through his mask. His spearing movements became more erratic as a mind numbing frenzy began to overtake him again. He was so caught up in his punishment that he didn't notice a bump forming underneath Hidan's coat or that the emotions motivating Hidan's screams might not have been just pain.

Hidan cried out loud as a pool of blood leaked out from his chest onto the floor. And another emotion that he wished to fuck would go away at the time began to build from deep within him.

"No…stop it…" Hidan whispered, his eyes closed.

With one more spear through his chest, Hidan's eyes rolled back into his skull and he moaned out loud, and a puzzled Kakuzu felt a wet spot appear beneath him. "Ohhh." Hidan said over again as a wave of pleasure swept through him. His body changed back to normal and the black and white stripes across his skin faded away as his concentration evaporated and he released the technique.

Kakuzu burned Hidan under his fiery, wild, excited eyes and groaned when he realized that he had excited Hidan. The little religious fool was being sexually excited by this excessive violence. Hidan was beautiful spread across the floor, drowning in his own blood. It was like artwork come to life.

Then suddenly, to Hidan's surprise and immense pleasure, Kakuzu's arms were free and feeling all around him – under his cloak, across his side, everywhere - though Hidan's arms were still bound by those black tentacles.

Hidan moaned again as he felt himself rise again with unexpected ardor. _Ah shit_, he thought. He sure to hell didn't expect _this_ to happen. _Well, if you can't beat' em…join 'em…for now…_He tried to free his arms, but couldn't and words came out in a jumble in his pleasure-induced state.

"Kakuzu…you bitch…my arms…easier…go…" He managed to get out between gasps. In another moment, his arms were free, but his body was still bound. It seemed Kakuzu didn't trust him enough to let go. He returned Kakuzu's rough caresses in turn, tearing the man's cloak from his body and feeling his chest and smooth, hard stomach. His whole body seemed to be covered in rough, long bumps. Stitches of some sort, but Hidan didn't mind. Normal people were never his type anyways. He wanted to tear the mask off his face, but when his hands got close to the fabric edge, hoards of tentacles broke free and grabbed his arm. Not the kissing type, Hidan realized. He satisfied himself by letting his lips suck the hollow of his neck.

Kakuzu felt something he hadn't felt in many, many years. Pure, unadulterated lust. Of course, there was good reason for this. It was hard to restrain his killing instinct in bed, and that meant the other person would almost surely die. And he, no matter what he himself was, didn't like dead people in bed. He could kill people in cold blood and rip their hearts out, but the thought of lying with dead flesh sickened him so he had settle on a life of celibacy. But now there was this warm lithe immortal beneath him with rock-solid abs and a beautiful blond face and a smooth, hard body that moaned against his that sent off all sorts of warning radars in him, and man or woman, he just didn't care. And the man was _responding_ to him, with kisses and caresses and sounds that crept up from his chest. He was confident that Hidan couldn't move free no matter what. Not that Hidan wanted to, at the moment.

Hidan worked his hands furiously. He wanted some mouth action, but it seemed he wasn't going to get any. He settled on Kakuzu's neck, leaving bloody bites on marred skin. Rather than turning Kakuzu off, the bite marks excited him even more. He struggled to undo Kakuzu's Akatsuki robe, and ended up ripping the whole thing apart. Not to be undone, Kakuzu's tentacles ripped all of Hidan's clothes into little shreds, tossing it aside in pieces of now useless cloth.

Then Kakuzu's arms suddenly found his manhood, and began stroking the leaking shaft up and down with fervor. Hidan moaned even louder than he thought possible, the last almost coming out like a whimper. "Fuck you…you're pretty good, huh." Hidan said as a hard, icy hand squeezed, extracting another gasp from him.

"No." Kakuzu breathed back as he leaned up and unbuttoned the front of his pants. "I'm going to fuck you."

Hidan smiled crazily. "I haven't been bottom in years."

"Get used to it."

And suddenly Kakuzu was a rod of solid steel in Hidan, and Hidan screamed out in pure pleasure-pain. Kakuzu rocked back and forth madly. Blood leaked from underneath Hidan to stain the ground even more. The abrupt penetration with nothing to help it had scratched away skin.

"Ah Jashin-sama!" Hidan cried out to his god, then to Kakuzu." You're the fucking sex."

Kakuzu rode Hidan, hard. "This might kill you." He whispered into his ears. "…it's been awhile. You're tight. So tight…" He whispered into Hidan's ear. Kakuzu's arms were tussled in Hidan's hair and he felt their smooth silkiness.

"Go ahead, if you can." Hidan challenged back.

Without warning, more black tentacles burst wildly from Kakuzu's body. With his slipping control, Kakuzu couldn't hold apart the mass within him. Some tentacles flailed wildly in the air, some caressed Hidan. Some pierced his chest again.

Hidan screamed out again at each thrust from Kakuzu and each piercing tentacle through his chest, but in pure euphoria. "Fuck…you…you…_are_ kinky."

He reared his head back and lost himself in the feeling of a hard body pushing into him and a feeling of fullness in him for what seemed like forever.

Kakuzu could feel himself approach the plateau. Then, with three more thrusts, he moaned, and leaned over Hidan breathless.

"So we're even, eh." Hidan struggled to say, caught up in the moment.

"I…" Kakuzu tried to breath out. With the end of his orgasm, he reigned back in his body, and the most of the tentacles that had escaped were forced back in. "I…might let you live yet."

Hidan had come a moment before Kakuzu, and he relaxed as Kakuzu's cold body fell on him. He trembled with post-coital pleasure. "Fuck you. I'm letting _you _live."

Hidan looked to his left to where there were still two decapitated jounin. And then to himself. Kakuzu's black ropes or whatever they were, still bound him tight, but that didn't hide the plain fact that Hidan was butt-naked, his clothes more viciously torn off then Kakuzu's could possible be. He would need to go to the nearest town for some new clothes. And he had to clean the evidence of these damn bodies.

"Ah damn."


	2. To Love is to Hold

Strange Love - To Love is to Hold

…

…

…

The inn was, in essence, at the peak of its lifetime business. New, young, needy customer's filed in everyday for a chat, a hard beer, some young ladies, sometimes young boys, or maybe even a rest at one of the newly renovated rooms which recently had sent its price sent skyrocketing via the influx of wannabe ninjas or casual tourists.

All for the newly discovered ancient pre-war village ruins, just a quick ten-minute stroll from town. The ruins were so close and convenient and undeniably interesting that even teenagers and kids with time to waste wandered there on their free time. It had been a surprise to the villagers of that small town itself, never knowing that the small, picturesque lake they had used as a water reservoir housed ruins that made treasure-hunters, artifact explorers, and every dreaming thief salivate until puddles of greedy spit formed at their feet.

And the town had embraced the ruins completely. Ninja-post-cards, ninja-ramen, ninja-inns, ninja weapons, fake of course, ninja scrolls, and other ninja apparel. The tourists fell for it all, bait, hook, and trap.

What made the sunken village different from the hidden villages was that it wasn't _hidden_. The hidden villages themselves kept their location from being revealed to the mass public, and knowledge of their secrets and visitors were carefully regulated to ensure their privacy. After all, the hidden villages were first and foremost institutions that served as the elite of the military organizations for their country.

But, ruins as irresistible as fallen ninja village ruins attracted all sorts of people, especially when no one could determine their origin. There were nice people…and there were bad people. And right now, this inn was full of the latter. Sitting around the tables as if they owned the joint, the beer-guzzling, smelly group comprised of bandits, wannabe ninjas and other peoples often referred to as the cesspools of society, had driven out the normal customers.

The bartender and owner of the establishment stood behind the counter, making sure to avoid any and _all_ eye contact with the bunch of hooligans. He stood there, fidgeting, wiping off the same bottle of wine that was in his hand for the last two hours. He prayed, hoping that they would leave soon.

At about, oh, _now_.

That wasn't happening, and he had no idea what to do. He didn't want to make waves; waves were bad. Waves meant bar fights. And bar fights meant the possible destruction of the inn and his property, at least with this crowd. No, no waves, not when he had almost managed to pay off the debt he had accumulated to build the inn in this teeny town.

He gulped. Raising his eyes just a fraction of the inch to check the situation, he couldn't help but turn his vision to the two strangers who sat at a stocky wooden table. They _had_ first seemed like the normal wayfarers that had been going in and out, though upon closer inspection, they were extraordinarily strange. They were two men, and both individuals radiated all sorts of dangerous waves.

The first one, who looked a bit sullen, was a beautiful young man who looked to be around his early mid twenties, with exquisite model-quality facial features. High, delicate cheek bones and a strong, straight nose led up to a flawless forehead accentuated with an almost perfectly slicked back widows peak. He had intense baby sapphire eyes, almost as intense as the man's next to him, and perpetually pouty lips that looked as if they were two pink clouds. He wore a high-collared black shirt that outlined a flat stomach and six-pack abs, along with a loose pair of dark-colored pants. A necklace, with a round circle inset with a triangle, rested around a thickly corded neck. He imagined that if angels ever existed, this is what they would look like. A badass angel. Right now, the badass angel relaxed against a chair as he sipped periodically from a glass of sake.

The other man was even stranger. Taller than the first man, he looked to be in his early thirties. His entire body was covered in a bulky cloak, a black robe with floating red clouds that seemed ominous to the innkeeper. His face was covered too, and all he could see were a pair of piercing white eyes.

When he looked into those eyes, a fear gripped his heart. If the other man was an angel, this man was surely some demon that came from the pits.

Two words came to the innkeepers mind. '_Ninja_'. And '_danger'_. He could tell that the two forehead protectors that the two had with them weren't the fake kind that the vendors sold. And they were scratched out, each with a long rusted line right through the middle. Renegade ninja, or cast-out ninja, or ninja who just wanted to seek their own path. None of the choices were good.

This was all suspicious enough, but the thing that really set the innkeeper over the edge was the giant three-bladed scythe that the blonde young man had strapped across his back.

It looked very, very sharp, and very, very used.

…

…

…

Hidan swigged down another burning shot of alcohol. The sake was horrible. He hadn't expected anything but watered down shit from an establishment like this, but this was piss poor alcohol.

Not only was he drinking shit, he felt like shit too.

Ever since his new and boringly money-grubbing partner Kakuzu had tried to kill him – failed, of course - and ended up sexing him in the middle of the forest next to two headless corpses, he had ignored him for the most part until they reached this village. Things had gotten awkward between them since then.

After sex, the man had rose up, put on his clothes, and then acted as if nothing had happened.

He even had the audacity to make him, _him_ of all people, clean up the bodies.

The memory made Hidan fume further.

"There might be more nin-hunters" Kakuzu had said to him, "Clean up _your_ mess."

As if the nin-hunters weren't looking for him in the first place!

_What the hell!_ Did that fucking Kakuzu think that he, the _immortal_ and damn good-looking Hidan was a fucking _kid_? Speechless, Hidan had complied, but not without a good amount of cursing. He needed the bodies for his ritual after all.

Whatever.

Hidan had been left naked in the bamboo forest until (he made a 'thank you Jashin-sama' gesture with his hand) some kid dressing up as a ninja stumbled through the same path. Luckily they were close enough to the this little town that someone had heard the noise and curious, wandered in too see what was going on.

Hidan had knocked the boy unconscious and stole his clothes, leaving him alive. He didn't kill worthless trash; it tainted his religion.

He wandered into the town. He didn't like this place. It reminded him too much of home. But he could ignore thoughts like that, and planned to enjoy himself for the rest of the day as Kakuzu did whatever it was he was doing. Pickup a young man or two, buy a dozen bottles of alcohol, and head to the nearest inn for the rest of the day inebriated and with some lithe body underneath him. But his plans were instantly ruined by Kakuzu. His damn partner had appeared right as he entered the entrance to town.

Kakuzu had offered him a newly sown and squeaky clean new Akatsuki robe, but Hidan had refused. For a second, Hidan wondered if his partner kept a stash of those robes somewhere. No way in hell would he wear one again so soon if it was going to be ripped. The robe was constricting anyways. Kakuzu looked as if he would trip on himself any moment.

After that, they had settled in the inn where Hidan had taken a wonderful hot shower, and both of them met downstairs in the dining room that doubled as lobby and tripled as reception to discuss what their next plan of action would be.

"So," He began in a bored, tired voice. "What are we doing here again? Could you _please _explain to me, in full detail, why we are in a backwater village? Why _I_ am here?"

"Do you know what these newly discovered ruins are?" Kakuzu asked.

"Umm…lemme think about that." Hidan chewed his lip for a moment as he tried to recall all those lessons and books that he had read however many years ago. He was never good at memorizing things like that, but he could more or less guess.

"Ancient shinobi villages that were destroyed before the village wars?"

"That's all you know?" Kakuzu responded with a heavy dose of disbelief. "Did you even listen to the leader as he explained?"

Hidan sighed and lifted his shoulders. "Nah. Boring lectures aren't for me. Besides, who cares?" Hidan said. "So what if a village disappeared of screwed itself over, it's not like it affects me. The weak are weak and weak villages will ruin themselves at some point."

Kakuzu made a 'hmph' sound. Hidan scowled; he didn't like being looked down upon.

"Okay smartass, if you're so knowledgeable then why don't you tell me.

"I'll tell you then." Kakuzu began, "Before the first village wars, a recorded four villages were wiped off the map. Simultaneously."

"Before the first ninja wars?" Hidan repeated. The first ninja war was a long, _long_ time ago.

"How long ago?"

"A few hundred years."

"Infighting? Invasion?" Hidan guessed, ticking off the usual reasons.

"No. About three hundred years before the shinobi village wars, there was no way that four villages could suddenly disappear. Not even now could that happen. The villages themselves are only mentioned in passing in some ruined texts, and they precede even the main villages. The records were hard to find because the villages were tiny, being located in small countries. The leader himself pieced together clues from scrolls to obtain this information."

Hidan's fingers drummed against the table. "And…"

"That must mean that there was a power behind the events that lead to the distruction of the villages. Our mission is to locate any clues or hints as to what could have possibly done this. And if there is something worth taking here, then we take it. Locate and retrieve. Simple enough for someone of your mental capacity to understand."

Hidan growled.

Kakuzu seemed very excited at the prospect, Hidan noted. "So that's why we are here? To look through a dead village's scrap heaps? Boooring." Hidan extended the o sound, and leaned back even further to showcase his boredom. "Besides, why are _you _so excited?"

Kakuzu gave a deep laugh. "Money. Ancient artifacts from villages are hundreds of million of ryo to the right customer. And there is always someone willing to pay."

Hidan wanted to snort, but thought better. "Is money all that matters to you? There are more important things in life."

"Like what?" Kakuzu asked with bit of dubiety.

"Religion. Beliefs. Jashin is always looking for new converts. Perhaps Jashin might even welcome a atheistic money-grubbing heathen like you." Hidan grinned. "On second hand, I doubt even Jashin would welcome you. Except as a sacrifice"

"And money is bad?"

"No. But mindlessly chasing after it is. In the end, we all die."

"If that is your only reason then you're nothing more than a blind sheep."

"Someone with no religion like you could never understand the wonder of god, or the beauty of his words." Hidan said.

"Hmph. Since I was born into this world, I've seen religions fall and faiths collapse like a house of cards. Only one is ever lasting. Money." Kakuzu replied firmly.

"Money is not eternal. Conviction, belief. Faith. Things people like you will never be able to buy up no matter how much ryo you have. If you saw a religion dissapear, it was probably because it was a false one. The only true belief is Jashin."

"The same words they all said."

"You don't believe in anything?"

"I do have faith. Faith in human greed. Intangible things like morality and gods can't be banked anyways."

Hidan fixed his eyes on Kakuzu and knew he was telling his personal truth. He remembered the feel of the man's coarse skin upon his. Colder and harder than gold coins. It brought pleasant shivers down his back. Hidan dismissed the thought.

"Whatever. Money can hardly count as a religion. I doubt someone as idolatrous as you could understand the warm embrace of Jashin-sama. Perhaps I can instill the fear of god in you?" Hidan recommended, his eyes growing heated.

Kakuzu bore deep-white eyes into Hidan and held him. "You can try."

Hidan held his stare, not backing down.

He wondered if Kakuzu would try to kill him again right here in the inn?

He wondered if they would have sex afterwards too. He wanted the man to take him right here, right now. Screw everyone else in the lobby. Nothing wrong with a little exhibitionist streak now and then.

Hidan was so distracted in his thoughts that when one of the windows of the inn shattered and five black clad figures burst through, it took him an extra second to turn to see the commotion, which was an extra second too much.

Three well-placed kunai sank straight into Hidan's forehead, piercing through his skull and brain. The force propelled him flying into the air until he crashed into the wall.

Kakuzu had risen up, his skin flashed as he changed color, the beginning of his earth-element technique that increased his strength to ridiculous heights and made him more durable then diamonds. In this state he was practically impervious to any and all physical damage.

A ninja swung a long sword at him. The blade cracked on his head, and Kakuzu merely reacted by instict reached out snapped the man's neck. Using the dead man as a projectile, Kakuzu swung the man into another man, knocking him over.

In the mean time, Hidan had recovered, using the nearby wall as leverage.

"Fucking _hell_!" He screamed. "Just did my _god damn hair_!" Did these fools know how long it took to get each strand in perfect place? He braced himself for what was coming next. With a quick twist of his hand, he pulled one kunai from his skull, ignoring the stabbing pain and the following migraine.

He hated those headshots and blamed Kakuzu for talking to him so much that he didn't even sense some idiotic ninjas approaching. At least his partner was taking out the trash.

He dropped his feet against the floor and took another breathe. Two more kunai left.

Around him, the hooligans that had occupied the bar had all made a straight dash for the only exit in the bar. In the face of real danger, they had all abandoned their bad boy attitudes and ran screaming. They formed a bottleneck, clogging up the exit as terror filled the air. Everyone avoided Kakuzu as he fought the black clad shinobi.

The three remaining ninja, formed a line. They began forming a series of seals with their hands, as chakra molded itself in their bodies. It compressed, heating in their bodies.

"Who sent you here?" Kakuzu asked in an amused tone. He sighed when they didn't respond. They were probably scared witless that two of their comrades had died so easily. These shinobi were around chuunin-level, he guessed, but they had managed to surprise that little god-thumper Hidan. The Jashinist was lucky he was immortal. Or was it because he was immortal that he slacked in paying attentions to his surroundings? He had heard these men ever since he sat down in a chair.

_Were they sent here to kill us?_ Kakuzu thought. He couldn't identify which village they were from. In fact, none of them wore the standard clothes that ninja from a village would wear. He'd have to question them later.

The three chuunin-level ninjas completed their seals. "**Fire Release: Dragon Heat!"** They said, their voices and chakra in unison.

Kakuzu would have attempted to dodge, but he recognized the order of seals that the shinobi formed. He stood his ground, letting them complete their desperate attempt to kill him.

The three inhaled, their chests expanding as raging heat filled their lungs. They released together, and suddenly the inn was in the midst of a raging inferno.

Wood caught fire, fabric burned, water sizzled, the men that hadn't made it out of the inn screamed as their flesh singed and barbecued, the fire technique of the three combined into an enormous continuous fireball.

"Pathetic. Who is foolish enough to send amateurs?"

From the center of the crimson blaze, the color of the heat changed, the movements of someone illumating the shadows of the flames.

The three ninja's eyes snapped open and they stopped their fire breath, their surprise apparent as Kakuzu finish the last of his seals.

"**Fire Release: Burning Pain**!"

The flames from the inferno split straight down the center, a technique or a higher caliber than anything the three could ever cast cut directly down the center of the roar. The three attempted to dodge, but the S-level technique caught two in its path. Now _this_ was real fire. Those two instantly flared up in a mini-explosion as skin melted away like ice cream in daylight, their bodies bursting like popcorn.

The last remaining ninja jumped back, sweat dripping down his face profusely, and turned around to run away.

Kakuzu's still cool hand, unfazed by the fire, caught him by the collar. He emerged from the inferno unscathed. "A technique of that level won't work on me, kid."

The ninja tried to grab a weapon, but Kakuzu's hand grabbed the man's wrists. He broke both of them, the jagged bone jutting from torn skin.

The ninja screamed.

Kakuzu leaned forward and whispered a promise into the ninja's ear. "You're going to tell me everything you know, whether you're alive…or not. And trust me, you're going to suffer."

Suddenly, he spotted a flash of metal in the fire – just in time for Hidan's scythe to sever the head of the last ninja.

Hidan howled in delight as the head flew into a wall. "Hell _yes_! That's what you get for fucking trying to burn me alive!"

Kakuzu trained his eyes on Hidan and let go of the headless body. "Do you know what you just did?"

"Took the fuckers head, that's what." Hidan replied. "If you have a problem with that, then you can go fuck yourself, alright, Kakuzu? I have the hugest fucking headache this side of hell, and I'm not in the mood to put up with your greedy shit."

Kakuzu closed his eyes.

_1…2….3…_by three he was calm.

He opened his eyes. They needed to get out of here before the villagers and other curious people decided to come. It would make it much harder to complete the mission if the townsfolk got involved.

"We're getting out of here." He stated.

"Aww." Hidan said both with regret and sarcasm. "But I wanted a new tan."

"Go, or I'll flay your skin from your bones." Kakuzu warned. He turned around and stepped through a large burning hole in the wall of the inn.

There were, in fact, several large burning holes in the inn.

"Ooo…" Hidan whispered to himself before following his partner. "I might enjoy that."

…

…

…

Kakuzu was raging. With every step that he and Hidan took away from the inn, anger built in him greater that before, coming in question after question to himself.

Why did he have to be paired up with a complete imbecile?

Was the leader daft these days?

Kakuzu did admit that Hidan's mysteriously strange immortality did hold great possibilities for several situations, but still, weren't there minimum guidelines for intelligence for all members of Akatsuki, or was the organizations just turning into a clown circus.

Hidan, wisely on his part, had been almost silent the entire time that they had run away from the inn where the strange ninjas had ambushed them. He knew that Kakuzu was mad for some reason, and even a little comment might set off the extremely dangerous missing-nin.

"Hey, Kakuzu!" Hidan began to say, after they had made it safely to the outskirts of town.

"_What_?" Contempt flattened Kakuzu's voice.

"I _umm_…need to wash myself somewhere." Hidan was trying very hard not to laugh at Kakuzu's tone. He found the larger man's anger oddly amusing.

"You need to wash yourself?" Kakuzu asked, stopping midtrack.

Hidan pointed to various spots on his body. Dry blood trailed off from his head in dirty red streaks and parts of his clothes were singed from the fire. "I don't know how your clothes were not affected, but I wasn't that lucky. Be strange if someone spotted a bloody man walking, now wouldn't it?" Hidan suggested.

Kakuzu gave Hidan a quick once over. He was right. "Very well. We're almost near the lake anyways."

"Aren't there people near the lake? That's where the ruins are located around right?" Hidan asked.

The question surprised Kakuzu. He hadn't expected Hidan to think that, or even remember anything he had said. Perhaps the immortal wasn't as idiotic as he first supposed.

"No. The ruins have been cordoned off from the general public ever since they were discovered. The town is waiting for an envoy from the main village to arrive and inspect the village to evacuate any artifacts or such. After that, they also have to disable any traps that might be left there before any tourists can go."

"Ahhh." Hidan said. "Perfect then. I'll just need to wash myself off then we can have a little look-see around."

"Hmph. I really needed you to tell me that." Kakuzu interjected, sarcasm filling his tone. "Did you know that you killed someone who could have told us why they were after us?"

Hidan blanched. "Woops. I owe you one then."

"Next time, try not to kill everyone _unless_ I say so. It will save time."

"That's going to be hard." Hidan said. "The script of Jashin says no one must be left alive. It's sacred, ya know. _Sacred_"

"I don't _care_ if anything is sacred." Kakuzu sneered. "Think before you do anything. You could have cost us, cost _me_, the mission."

"It's not like I didn't know that there was something going on." Hidan said, offended by Kakuzu's grade on his intelligence. "But it's hard to not want to get revenge. Especially when you had to pull out _three _kunai from your own head and endure being burned alive. Not much fun."

Kakuzu snorted. "I bet you enjoyed it."

Hidan smiled devilishly. "Perhaps I did? But things are funner this way don't you think? Being chased by a shadowy group of assassins, in the face of danger...sounds like something we would do."

Kakuzu sighed and shook his head. This idiot never took anything seriously. "We still have to figure out who is after us and how they found us."

"Perhaps they were ordered to find 'a guy in a black coat with red clouds' or something to that extent. You're practically a walking target with that thing on!" Hidan suggested, referring to Kakuzu's Akatsuki cloak that he always wore. "Get realistic! Wear something cool. Like me." Hidan fingered his formfitting shirt.

"It's sign of pride. Only the strongest can wear this. You'll learn to wear it sooner or later."

"Doubt it.

Before they situation degenerated into further argument, the two finally reached the lake.

It was beautiful. Sparks of sunlight reflected off its near-perfect surface, and the lake itself was a natural deep blue hue, testament to the beauty that nature could exhibit.

And naturally, Hidan yelled '_WOOT'_ after stripping naked from head to his toes, and diving headfirst into the pristine waters.

Hidan was enjoying himself. He loved to swim, after all.

Kakuzu watched from the embankment as Hidan stripped and rushed into the lake. His eyes were drawn to the tight, lean body that Hidan presented, even though he had considerable willpower he wasn't able to drag his eyes away. His gaze traveled down the planes of Hidan's flat stomach, noting the beads of water that collected on his pale, bronzed skin.

There was just something about the blond that frustrated him. Though they knew each other for only two days or so, there was something about him that infuriated him like no one else. The normally calm him just reacted in unfamiliar ways to this man.

As the water clung to him, he realized this man had captured his attention. He found his eyes gazing at the man even when they were just walking. The man was just so full of life it was as if were bursting with it. He laughed. Everyone was compared to him, the monster that stole hearts to live.

He wanted to kill him and argue with him and fuck him at the same time. And with him, it was possible to do all three.

Simultaneously.

Meanwhile, blissfully unaware Hidan let himself go when he felt the cool water on his skin. He hadn't felt such nice, refreshing water in a while. Normally water from the main towns were dirty after going through miles of pipes, but this water was pure, and he could feel the difference.

It felt like water from his home village.

He was a bit surprised however, when midway through his 'bath', an icy cold pair of arms encircled his waist and a solid cold hardness flattened itself against his back. Pleasant goose bumps rose on his arms.

"Kakuzu, what the hell!" Hidan yelled, turning around and seeing his partner had joined in too.

Kakuzu's eyes were inscrutinable. He had stripped his clothes off and waded into the water behind Hidan.

But he had left on one item, Hidan noticed. His mask.

Kakuzu voice was low against the elastic skin on Hidan's neck. "'I owe you one', you said."

"Fuck, I didn't mean this, you idiot!" Hidan tried to twist away, but it was no use. He turned to face his partner. "Let me go, or I am _so_ going to kill your ass when I get my shit back!"

"You're not even trying to get away. I can feel it." Kakuzu said, his truth piercing through Hidan's reluctancy. Hidan's eye twitched. It was the gross truth.

Kakuzu continued," you can try, though you'll find me harder to kill than most." Kakuzu hummed against his Hidan's neck. The blond was so warm, even in the lake. He could feel his heat seeping into his own cold body, as if someone the man's life could feed into him. How would it feel to do it in the water? To thrust into this man as he clung to him, whimpering and calling his name. Even before he had been an Akatsuki, before he had ended up killing everyone that ever grew close to him, he had never had sex in the water. Kakuzu felt himself grow hard at the thought.

He found himself thinking about things he would never normally think about.

"Fuck you." Hidan's lip curled. He suddenly bit down on Kakuzu's neck, drawing blood. He licked it from his lips. "I can still kill you without a weapon." He warned. "My curse works any time."

"Hm?" Kakuzu said in an amused tone. Suddenly, Hidan's arms were wrapped in writhing black tentacles, restricting his movement.

Hidan growled. "Fucking cheater."

Kakuzu laughed. He dangled Hidan with his strings, leaving his hands free to feel the warm immortals body. It was so strange, he thought, that there was anyone's body that could emit such heat. Hidan ran hotter than a normal human's body. He felt down smooth hairless skin and the iron muscles beneath. It was so different from his body.

Hidan finally stopped his complaining, and gave a little moan as Kakuzu found his nipples and began playing with them.

"I found a weak spot, _hmm_?" Kakuzu whispered.

"_Asshole_..." Hidan said. He gave up his resistance after realizing there was no way he could win at the moment.

What was that phrase? Revenge was a dish best served…uh…in bed…? Hidan could hardly think at the moment, thoughts jumbling in his mind as Kakuzu played with his body in an oh so delicious way.

"Well, Hidan?" Kakuzu's finger trailed down his arm, eliciting goose bumps in its wake.

Hidan managed to breathe out a question, "what do you want from me?"

The answer was apparent when Kakuzu kicked Hidan's legs out from beneath him. He found himself facing Kakuzu's proud manhood. It was a good thing that they moved in where the water was reasonably shallow. The top of the lake reached only to Hidan's shoulders.

Hidan stopped for a moment. Who the hell did Kakuzu think _he_ was, a weepy little girl? He fucked people, not vice-versa. He would have stopped, but something about Kakuzu strangely turned him on in ways he didn't realize possible.

_Fine_, he reasoned to himself, next time I'll make him pay me back with interest.

"Suck it." Kakuzu said, though it was unnecessary.

Hidan took a moment to touch Kakuzu's skin. He was so pale, he thought. He needed to a tan. Maybe he'd get him some self tanning cream as a birthday present some day. There was odd stitching all over his body, even his calf and thighs. He saw a bead or pre-cum gather on the tip of Kakuzu's penis.

_We're going to play this my way,_ Hidan thought. He slowly licked the round head, eliciting a groan from Kakuzu. He was surprised. Kakuzu tasted pleasant. It was faintly sweet, and hinted of strength and man. He used his right hand to hold the base of Kakuzu's penis while he began to lick the top. His hand barely reached fully around the whole of Kakuzu.

"Take it in." Kakuzu encouraged quietly. The scene of watching the normally rebellious Hidan subservient to him almost pushed him to the edge, but he held back.

Hidan sucked in a little of Kakuzu and smiled as the missing-nin trembled from head to body. He pushed his tongue into the slit, and swirled his rough tongue around the smooth head, enjoying the power he was having over Kakuzu. How the proud ninja was trembling in his hands. What would happen if he did this? He took the whole of Kakuzu's cock down his throat.

Kakuzu almost choked. "More." He ordered. Kakuzu's hands were in his hair, messing up the delicately placed strands.

Hidan began to bob his head slowly, up and down the length until he felt the tip of the head bump against the back of his throat. He let his tongue roam from top to bottom, and felt the ridge that was on the bottom of his cock, felt the thick vein that ran up the side. He let more pre-cum gather in the back of his mouth before swallowing the nectar. He closed his eyes and played around with Kakuzu, experimenting on what he did that made Kakuzu react more, making sure there was constant pleasure.

He found that a long suck followed by a hard bite on the head was his favorite.

Then Kakuzu's arms grabbed him by the head and pulled him back up. Hidan saw that his eyes were glazed over with lust and passion. He knew what to do. Jumping up, he wrapped his legs around Kakuzu's waist and felt the tip of the erection push against his entrance.

Without warning, Kakuzu was suddenly hilt-deep into Hidan, and Hidan screamed against Kakuzu's neck, muffling the sound by biting into the cold flesh. The entry of the much larger Kakuzu nearly broke him apart.

"Fuck you're huge." Hidan grunted. He was slightly jealous that Kakuzu was bigger than him, but what could he do? He thought he was pretty large too.

Kakuzu breathed heavily into Hidan and he continued pumping into his body. The roughness of the unaided entry sent streams of deep red blood flowing into the water below him, but he knew that Hidan enjoyed the pain. This little pain was nothing compared to the waves of intense pleasure washing through them both.

Hidan trembled as each time Kakuzu drew back and pushed in, feeling the large cock hit against his sensitive prostate. Then, he shuddered one last time and screamed out loud "Kakuzu you…ahh" He moaned loudly "You fucking…ahh…bitch…" , and a stream of white cum erupted from him in spurts, and trailed down Kakuzu's stomach.

Kakuzu wasn't far behind. Two more pumps and a muffled groan later and a white heat burned through Hidan's inside. A trail of white and red leaked from Hidan into the water.

The two Akatsuki breathed heavily and held onto each other as the pleasure of their orgasms washed through them.

"Fuck that's intense…" Hidan said tiredly, legs still wrapped around his partner, and lidded eyes looked up to behind Kakuzu. He clung to him, knowing that if he let go now he would fall ungracefully into the water.

And then his pupils widened. "Kakuzu - !"

Before Kakuzu could turn his head, Hidan grabbed him by the neck and twisted him away from the kunai that had launched directly towards Kakuzu's blind spot. Normally Kakuzu would have sensed it before it was even thrown, but the sex beforehand had dulled his warning senses, and Hidan wasn't sure if Kakuzu would be able to survive a shot to the head, no matter how many hearts he had.

Hidan took the kunai in the neck, and a fountain of blood rained into the air. The kunai had pierced his jugular.

Hidan's eyes narrowed as a new anger came over him. He reached up and steadied himself to pull out the kunai..

Fatal for a normal human, but a mere sting to him.

"Not _again_, damnit!"


	3. Through Thick and Through Thin

Strange Love – Through Thick and Through Thin

…

…

…

Hidan flinched. He held his hand up to the aching pain that was like a hot iron in his neck.

He let out a morose sigh, jotting down a brief mental note to not touch the wound until it healed. It brought back the unpleasant memory of its dislodgement each time he touched it.

That kunai had sunk in deep, halfway before striking bone and nicking his spine. The kunai was also a special model; the blade was ridged with tiny barbed spirals so the pain in taking it out would be excruciating. To top it off, Kakuzu, surprised, had tossed him backwards into the water, without even a thank you for potentially saving his life, leaving a floundering Hidan to drag himself back to shore.

Kakuzu stalked the shore. When he had made sure that whoever it was that had thrown that vicious projectile was gone, he walked back to the lake bank where a fuming Hidan. The site of a naked Kakuzu walking around would have been a huge mesmerizing if Hidan wasn't so unbelievably pissed at the moment.

Hidan felt had a right to be mad. Especially since that wonderful post-great-sex feeling had been utterly ruined. It was a macabre sight; the sulking, naked shinobi sitting cross-legged on the floor with a kunai protruding from his neck, his skin dyed red with blood. This was his roundabout way to show Kakuzu what he had taken for him, but instead of a word of 'oh thank you for preventing me from being nearly decapitated', the man had leaned down, and viciously tore it out.

Hidan could swear he could see the white lights of Jashin.

"There's a note on this." Kakuzu had noticed as he turned the kunai around in his hands, flicking a little piece of wax paper that was knotted around the pommel. He touched the tip of the kunai, flicking his thumb over its edge and tracing his hand down the barbs. "It's sharp. A fine make."

"Well," Hidan replied, lacing his words with as much hate as he could muster, "It might make you happy to know that the kunai _is_ very sharp. And before I begin to kick your ass, tell me what's on the damn note."

Kakuzu pulled out a tiny piece of parchment, unfolding it. The thin paper was dry, most likely the effect of a water repellent charm. Turning it around, he confirmed it when he saw a tiny blue printing of a water seal.

"Come to the ruins." Kakuzu read.

Hidan stared at him.

He stared back.

"What else?" The blond asked.

"That's it." Kakuzu confirmed.

Hidan stared blankly at him, disbelief creeping across his face, before sputtering, "Oh. And what did whoever-the-fuck think I was here for? To vacation near some lake and take a week-long bath? I'm so tired of this cryptic shit!"

"It seems someone wanted to get the point across."

"Oh." Hidan dead-panned. "I got the point all right. Right in my neck." He closed his eyes for a moment as he recounted the number of times he would have died if he were a normal human. It's not like near immortality lessened the pain! "Once I find out who the hell is behind this, heads are going to roll. I swear by Jashin."

"Don't make promises you can't keep."

"I always keep my promises."

"Hn. Whoever this person is, he isn't an amateur." Kakuzu thoughtfully noted. "To catch me in a moment of weakness, without my notice…it's been a few years since anyone managed to completely surprise me like that. Impressive."

"Moment of weakness?" Hidan bit back. "If I remember, it was _you _who were trying to rape _me_ in that lake!"

Kakuzu raised one eyebrow. "Can you rape the willing? It didn't seem like you had any objections?"

Hidan's eyebrows twitched. He _had_ succumbed with very few arguments.

"Y-you're just very good with your hands!"

"I'll take that as a compliment."

That fucking know-it-all! Hidan threw a rock at him which missed. "Whatever. I'm drawing the line right here, right now. You're not touching me anymore."

Kakuzu paused for a second, his feet tapping against the sand. "…A pity." He tossed Hidan some clothes, "finish dressing and we'll make our way to the ruins. If someone is looking for us, it would be rude for us to make them wait."

Hidan rolled his eyes and kicked up some more sand like a little boy. "It's obviously a trap."

"You picked that up quickly. Congratulations on your keen insight." Kakuzu replied, drawing a scowl from the blond. "Even if it's a trap, it won't matter. We're Akatsuki. All we need to do is to capture whoever and interrogate him."

"That is, if you don't act rashly and kill whoever is there." He added.

Hidan gave Kakuzu one last withering glare.

Kakuzu waited for a few minutes so Hidan could dress up. In the mean time, he pulled on his cloak and underclothes as he made a quick inventory of the items in his pack. Once he was done, he turned around to see Hidan still hadn't changed, and was sitting still naked, and still pouting.

"What are you waiting for?" Kakuzu asked, more than a little disgruntled. The idiot needed to be taught a lesson. He didn't like waiting for anyone. Time was money, and money was precious.

"My neck hurts." Hidan whined, rubbing the raw wound. It still bled profusely, as if the wound was fresh. "It should have healed by now…the kunai must have done more damage than I thought. I need more time. It hurts. I don't want to get my clothes all bloody."

"Your clothes are bloody all the time. In fact, I can't recall a moment where you've gone for more than a few hours without getting blood on you."

"There's a difference."

"What difference is that?"

"When the blood is on the outside, it's different. When it's in your clothes its annoying. It's squishy and feels weird. I don't like it."

"I don't care about the comfort of your clothes. You are wasting my time." Kakuzu stated calmly.

Hidan perched an eyebrow. "And what about _my_ time? I did take this for you after all. You know, because who knows what would have happened in your 'moment of weakness,' which, by the way, is the most fucking sorry excuse I've heard for being stupid. And _I_ noticed the kunai, so that makes me better, alright?" He mumbled, drawing a glare from Kakuzu.

He caught Kakuzu's stony gaze, and stared right back, defiant. What could zombie boy do to him, an _immortal,_ after all? He reached down deep into himself and drew from his chakra pool, and _pushed_, exerting as much chakra as he could through his gaze. This was the basis of killing intent. An average shinobi would have fallen to his knees, stunned into stupidity, but Kakuzu brushed it off as droplets of water spattering harmlessly against an ancient boulder.

Kakuzu pushed back.

They locked eyes with each other, waiting for the other to give in to the pure pressure they were exerting by chakra and mental strength. A minute later Kakuzu sighed. His chakra level fell down to natural levels. They would never get anywhere like this! He had objectives to complete, missions to accomplish, money to make, people to kill, and he had had enough of this childish staring contest. He was above this.

He didn't admit that a small part of him felt guilty too.

He approached Hidan and knelt over him, ignoring his flailing movements and holding his shoulders in the iron vice that was his hands.

"What the _hell_ are you doing?" Hidan protested, fighting back. It was useless. Deprived of his scythe and weapons, he was out-muscled and pinned to the floor. If only he knew more damn _jutsus_; like that useful replacement technique that he never bothered to study.

"Shut up. You're just like a little boy." Kakuzu ordered, and Hidan promptly head-butt him with as much force as he could leverage given the awkward position he was in. Kakuzu cursed, and used his arm to force Hidan's head down and his elbow to keep his arms from moving. "I'm helping you." He said through grit teeth.

"By doing what? I said no touching me until this mission is over! Do your ears not fucking _work_!" Hidan yelled as he tried to wriggle his way free. "Stop!"

"No. I won't. You don't want me to." Kakuzu let his head fall down and rest in the low curve of Hidan's collar-bone. Slowly, he reached up and peeled off his cloth mask.

"What makes you think I don't want you to?" Hidan said.

"Do you?"

"...oh...fucking hell..." Hidan trailed off.

Kakuzu licked the wound, leaving a now surprised and non-struggling Hidan. Kakuzu flicked his tongue up and around the area of entry. Blood and beads of salty sweat matted Hidan's skin. He tasted like the afternoon sun.

"My saliva has regenerative properties. Be still and I can help you." Kakuzu repeated. His voice was much gentler this time as he began to suck gently on the wound.

"Wha-wha…the fuck…" Hidan moaned. This wasn't what he was expecting. He felt his iron will, towering so imposingly a few moments ago, begin to crumble under Kakuzu's gentle ministrations. He forgot his promise to not let Kakuzu touch him.

He forgot everything.

It actually didn't feel that bad. In fact, it felt quite, quite good.

Amazingly, mind-blowingly so.

Kakuzu trailed his tongue lazily across the wound like a cool press, taking small tiny nips that elicited gasps from Hidan, and lapped up the hot, delicious, coppery blood. It smelt faintly like Hidan and himself, and he found that he enjoyed the musky scent of the immortal.

The pain subsided a few moments later, but Hidan kept stock still. It felt good enough that he didn't want this pleasure to end, and though he bit his lip to prevent his squeals of pleasure, he gave in and began to moan as Kakuzu bit at the rapidly mending skin. He could feel himself stir as swarms of pleasure cascaded down from his neck to the rest of his body. His mind became blurry, and at the edge of his senses he could feel something tickle his flesh, something like little strings that danced upon his nerves with tiny little strokes. And it came from inside Kakuzu's mouth. He didn't know what the hell it was, but Hidan could care less at the moment.

He wanted him to go lower, to savor more, to taste him and drive him into the ground until he became senseless and the world faded beyond meaning. Even though he had just had sex in the lake, he didn't care. He wanted Kakuzu's cold body against his, that calm, immovable strength. He wanted to feel those hard muscles and rub his palms against those imposing contours.

He wanted to scream everything he wanted Kakuzu to do to him, to let him violate him anyway left or right he wanted. But he still had his pride, and he bottled it in as tightly as he could though the pressure was rising and boiling and boiling until he thought the words would burst from his lips.

Kakuzu loosened his arms, and taking advantage of that, Hidan reached up and hooked his arms around the other Akatsuki's neck, tugging him closer to the crook oh his neck, not wanting to let him go. He wanted the delicious feelings Kakuzu was evoking to last forever.

"Ahh. _Ah_." He began to moan in short staccato timing.

Without any warning, Kakuzu stopped. He rose up, wiping off the excess blood from his mouth with his sleeve.

"Wa-wait." Hidan asked dizzily, rising on his elbows. The after waves of pleasure still washed through him, and his mind blanked. His eyes began to focus even as the wanton emotions raged so strongly in him.

"There was poison in the wound. That is why it was taking so long to heal. I removed the majority of it. There are still some slight traces in your blood stream, but it shouldn't stop someone like you. I also mended the wound for you."

Hidan felt the area again. His fingers bumped against a thin little string, just the like ones Kakuzu had all over his body. _The hell?_ _When did he do this?_ And then he remembered the feelings of little strings dancing across his skin. Ah. So Kakuzu had those black tentacles coming from more places than his arms and back.

Hidan was left speechless. The act of kindness was more than his mind could fathom. He could only hope their wasn't some magic mind controlling powers in it.

Kakuzu smirked when he saw the platinum-haired Akatsuki's frazzled eyes. "If you're worried about me, I've long been immune to poisons. Now let's go. We waste time." He turned, and began walking away towards the temple ruins, leaving Hidan behind.

Leaving Hidan behind with a raging erection.

"Wa-Wait! You! You can't just stop halfway! Come back you shit!" Hidan called out, but the words were lost to Kakuzu. By now, the pleasure had subsided, and something akin to a rage was seething in him again.

His eyes twitched. "Grrr!" That fucking _tease_! He would regret this!

…

…

…

…

The Ancient Village, a remnant of a time long lost, when shinobi ruled the world. It was, on a good day, unimpressive.

They had crossed into the portion of the lake that had receded, where the ruins were found. Hidan had been expecting more when they arrived. Not…this.

It shouldn't even have been classified as a village, Hidan thought sullenly. He and Kakuzu stood at the center of the largest section that was still standing. The ruins consisted of crumbling stone houses in the square shape of blocks, scattered about in an uneven pattern. Time had done a number on these ruins. The erosion from the water over the years had weathered down the buildings until they were little more than lumpy blocks. Not too bad, considering the centuries that had passed.

There wasn't a single building that was over two stories. Instead, many small houses dotted the landscape. Old water weeds and wet moss overran the stones, and they were in every nook and cranny, long since having claimed this village as their sovereign territory.

"This place is a dump." It was the first thought that crossed Hidan's mind. "The dump of dumps. I can't believe that there can be anything found here." He had traveled so far for _this_? He reached down and picked up a stone brick. With the slightest pressure, the gray relic came apart in his hands like fine dust. He dusted it off his clothes. "Really. What can we find here? I really want to know how this is _not_ wasting your time. And my time." He asked aloud.

Kakuzu on the other hand, was peering meaningfully at some ancient sigils that were carved into one of the brick house doorways. "Clues. The erosion is more advanced than I expected. I doubt there will be anything of value that can be recovered unless its buried deep in the ground or locked in some sealed chest. Even so, we still have to search for clues for what this civilization was."

"Like what?"

"Signs, markings. Any information is valuable. We can continue the search from there."

"The note?"

"If we're waiting for an ambush, there's no point in idling. They'll be here sooner or later. Or are you scared you're going to die?" Hidan asked, turning to face Hidan.

"As if."

"Good. Then take the time to complete the mission."

Hidan grunted, kicking more lumpy bricks into dust. "You do that. I'm going to sit here, and take a nice little nap until whoever sets his damn trap comes so I can kill him. Wake me up if he gets here."

"No, you won't." Kakuzu replied. He crooked his finger. "Come over here."

"Why!" Hidan said, suddenly angry. "Why do I have to do anything you say!"

Kakuzu paused, turning to see a livid Hidan, his fists balled at his side. Where had this come from? "Still mad? Stop acting like a little boy. You were the one who said not to touch you"

"You don't tease a man like that then leave him alone! And this...it's not about that!"

"What are you talking about?"

"Why are you always an such asshole?"

"I don't believe I am."

"You are!" Hidan said, his words stating his absolute belief. "You're bossy, you're rude, you're a arrogant, condescending heathen who touches me every moment he gets."

"Are you sure you aren't talking about yourself?"

"Shut the fuck up!"

"Are you a man or a boy?"

"A man!"

"Then act like one and stop your whining. Come over here."

Hidan's eyes popped open with fury, but he restrained himself. What an arrogant son of a bitch! Jashin take his soul! _For the mission_, he thought. _For the mission._

He closed his eyes. This was his first mission for Akatsuki, and he didn't want to seem like the incompetent member. He needed Akatsuki for a reason. Those other Akatsuki assholes, especially that Deidara, would never let him off the hook if they thought he was no better than a little child and compromising the mission. Taking three deep breaths, he calmed himself as much as he could and wandered over to where Kakuzu.

"Okay. What is it?" Hidan asked, looking at what Kakuzu was inspecting, but at the same time not noticing anything. "Found something interesting? Like a water bug or some shit like that?"

"No. That is something I would expect you to find. Come closer. Look at this." Kakuzu said. "This must be the village symbol, it's all over the doors. Though I haven't seen anything like this before."

Hidan leaned down over and when he saw what Kakuzu was looking at, a shiver ran down his spine that froze him on the spot.

He knew that symbol.

It was a round circle with four perfect triangles extending from the center. It was a symbol of a sun, and Hidan knew it very, very well.

"Do you recognize this?" Kakuzu asked, still looking quizzically at the sign. He turned to see Hidan voice locked in his throat, eyes darting to the side, "what's going on?"

"I know who set up the ambush." Hidan breathed. That caught Kakuzu's attention, and suddenly the Akatsuki had straightened, giving Hidan an intense, piercing look, realizing he had had a revelation.

Kakuzu connected the dots. "Whoever has been tracking us is related to this village?"

"Yes."

"Who is it?"

"It's –" Hidan began, before another voice cut him off.

It was a cold voice that echoed to them across the empty air. "Well done Hidan! I was waiting for you to draw the connection. You're impatient as always. I was wondering if I would have had to come out early…"

A man laughed and stepped out from behind a building. It seemed as if he emerged from the shadows, appearing from nowhere. He approached, the sun blazing behind him and lending his appearance a glowing halo. "I've been waiting for you for so long. You haven't changed much at all these years have you? I've missed you…will you not return with me?"

Hidan lips curled downwards in disdain and a host of memories came roaring back to with the force if a tidal wave. He looked up at his partner and wasn't surprised at the mild shock that had entered his eyes. They were practically identical twins after all. The same delicate cheek bones as him. The same strong, straight nose that led to a flawless widow's peak that framed an intense pair of silver eyes. Hair that was the color of bare, bleached bones.

Not even an idiot could mistake the obvious connection between the two, and Kakuzu was no idiot.

"Hidan. Is that your…?" Kakuzu began slowly, his eyes not leaving this new man who had again managed to surprised him.

"Yes." He grit his teeth. His hand gripped the length of his scythe until his knuckles turned white. Never before had he so wanted to lash out at someone like he did now. This man that used to be his subordinate, his confidant, and his lover…until he betrayed him and cast Hidan forever out of Jashin's grace.

"Hi, brother."

…

…

…

…

"Hi, brother." The words tumbled from Hidan's mouth like a foreign language. How many years, how many months, days, hours, minutes, seconds had it been, since he last whispered that word anywhere but his darkest nightmares?

It was a word that he had cursed every moment ever since he was kicked out of the temple of Jashin. Perhaps at some point the anger would have faded and he would have forgotten him, but now he was right here, right now in front of him, and his heart was gripped with spite.

It tightened with a hate greater than life.

A brief memory, pale and flittering.

…

…

…

_Hidan approached the alter room, his feet dragging across the smooth marble floor._

_An acolyte, one of many, came rushing forwards, his head bowed in reverence._

_You cannot interrupt the coronation ceremony of the High Priest, he had said, Hidan-sama is not to be bothered._

_Hidan blinked. Wait, what? _He _was the High-Priest. His eyes widened as he understood what had occurred. He pushed the acolyte aside, and when he resisted, He lopped of his head, clean and without pain, and pushed through the large wooden entrance. _

_The doors swung open, and in seat of power was a mirror image of him, or rather, his twin, a ray of chakra beaming forth, flooding the room until everything was bleached white in a haze of holy power… _

…

…

…

…

The memory disappeared as quickly as it came. The tangy taste of copper flooded Hidan's taste buds and he realized he had been biting the inside of his cheek until it drew blood.

"It's been a while." He said, almost casually, composing himself. "Don't you know that the High Priest can't leave the temple? It's against the rules." To Hidan's side, Kakuzu was keeping quiet, analyzing the situation, his attention hanging on every word.

"The High Priest of Jashin doesn't obey the rules – he makes the rules. And besides, how can I not come down to look for you? I've been missing you. I think about you all the time. Night and day, until dusk and dawn."

"What a coincidence. Me too. Probably not the same thoughts though. I've been thinking about how much I wanted to sacrifice you to Jashin-sama.

The man smiled. Hidan recoiled slightly. It was disconcerting to see that same dimple appear on his cheek.

What are you really here for, Shinki?" Hidan asked. The man, Shinki, wouldn't leave the temple for nothing…he knew better than that.

Shinki straightened, causing Hidan to tense and raise his guard. "You have something that's mine, and I'm here to take it back. Willing or not. Of course, the easy way is for you to come back with me…"

Immortality. Hidan realized. _His_ immortality.

"As the High Priest?" Hidan said at last. "No thanks, but that bird already flew the coop."

"As a lover...perhaps – an indentured slave, to be more precise. I'll have to wipe your memory clear, after all…you're too ambitious to let roam free. Since you are the only successful experiment of Jashin, as high priest I cannot let you go."

Hidan laughed to himself. Ha. Ha. How funny! "Do you think I'm going to go with you? You, Shinki, are still a fucking retard. Time doesn't change anything, does it? You never did respect your elders."

"Hardly the words I would expect to hear from a mass murderer."

Hidan grinned. "And you. Aren't you a successful experiment of Jashin also? You're nothing but a pale copy of me. Hidan-lite!"

"My genetic code is the same as yours, but the process for immortality oddly does not work on me as it did you. I plan on taking you back, and cut you open to see exactly what's so different about you."

Hidan snorted.

" I'll take that as a no?" Shinki asked.

"You can take that as one big _fuck off_. I'll give you to the count of ten to scoot your little ass out of here before you _really_ start to piss me off. For old times sakes."

Shinki's smile widened and his eyebrow arched up.

Hidan gripped his fists. Oh Jashin-sama, how he hated that arrogant little smirk of his. Damn. Was that a hypocritical thought?

"Then it comes down to force. Words never did work on you." Shinki switched his attention to Kakuzu, as if noticing him for the first time. "You there. I know you're a member of Akatsuki. I've heard of your little organization before, and I don't want to step on your toes. But this is personal. So don't interfere – unless you want to die."

"I will decide whether or not I wish to interfere." Kakuzu stated, and Hidan shook his head, smiling. This was one time when Kakuzu's overwhelming arrogance came in handy.

Hidan could feel Kakuzu lean into him, feeling his presence more than saw it. He didn't radiate much warmth, but yet there was a calming quality about him, something special that radiated from him and quelled Hidan's confusion. It felt…nice.

"Your brother?" Kakuzu asked quietly. His cool words belied his stony gaze.

"Yes." Hidan grit out. "Clone. I'm the original. We used to do some kinky stuff back in the day. You know how that stuff usually works."

"Immortal?"

"No."

"Good." That would make killing him easier. "Lover?" He asked again. Hidan turned towards him. What the fuck kind of question was that?

"What makes you think that?"

"The way he looks at you..." Kakuzu trailed.

"Ex-lovers. Ex. Emphasis on the ex. Ex, ex, ex. I don't need to explain myself to you. Sex is forbidden in Jashin. But he was my clone. So I figured it was like masturbation." Ridiculous. He didn't need to explain himself, so why did he feel obligated!

"…Hn." He said finally, "What does he want?"

Hidan shrugged. "Me. I'm one hot beast after all."

"Ah..." Kakuzu leaned back. "This isn't my business then. As an Akatsuki member, you should have settled any times you had to your past ties before joining…so you'll have to deal with this yourself."

His selfishness left Hidan in utter disbelief. He blurted out, "then what about that those two hunter-nin from earlier!"

"…I suppose you have a point. You have been annoying, and as a partner, wholly ineffective, with a number of downsides that far outweigh most, if any, of your positive traits. However, I've already invested too much time, and going back to see the leader is not really preferable. You do have a few good points..." Kakuzu rubbed his chin. Hidan could see then numbers clicking in his head. Positives and negatives. He was lining them all up in their neat little rows to see if Hidan was worth the trouble.

"You know what?" Hidan blustered at last. "I don't need you. I don't need your help. This is between us who worship Jashin. A heathen like you wouldn't understand."

Kakuzu ignored him, still deep in thought. He wanted to let Hidan go, and his gut instinct told him that if Hidan fought alone against this man, he would lose. Hidan hadn't been the most agreeable of partners...but why did his mind keep wandering to incidents in the past few days? Hidan, beneath him, moaning. Hidan, arguing with him. Hidan, taking a kunai for him. Hidan, laughing as they argued. Hidan, acting like an insufferable little child.

Shinki called out, "Are you done talking yet?"

Kakuzu had decided. And true to the business man that he was, like a binding contract, once he came to a decision, it was nearly impossible to change his mind.

His reply came as a stern warning.

"Yes. This conversation is over...and so are you. For interfering in our mission, in _Akatsuki's _mission…there is no punishment for you but a slow, grueling…"

"…Death."

And then it came. From within Kakuzu, an opening pulse of chakra so deep the ground began to shake, the dirt rustled, and the air started to hum as if a thousand crickets were singing in the night.

This was the chakra of an Akatsuki. A true, peerless warrior that feared no one and who others cowered before.

Kakuzu stepped forward, each footstep leaving a deep imprint in the floor. "You, whoever you are, are a fool. To come here alone, you must not have heard who I am. I don't care who you are and why you are here, but now you managed to catch yourself up in matters beyond your pitiable little religion, and you'll die for that."

Shinki narrowed his eyes at the new development. "Then it's come down to a battle between us?" He said to Hidan. "It doesn't matter if your ally here helps you or not. Don't you already know the outcome, Hidan?"

Hidan stepped forward, bringing his scythe to the fore. The familiar weight was heavy in his hands and reassuring. "Duh. You can't beat me, you know that? Every duel we've had before you've lost, Shinki – Or did you forget that?"

Shinki smiled like a snake. "And we'd have more fun afterwards, right?"

Hidan frown. His words had brought back unpleasant memories.

The clone continued. "I'm different from before. I am the High Priest now. I am he who is closest to Jashin, his right hand and his voice. I've gained powers you can't even _begin_ to imagine."

Hidan groan inwardly; Shinki always did have a thing for diatribes and long-winded speeches.

Sometimes, action was the most effective route.

"The seat of the High priest. It could have been yours but you were too lost in yourself and how proud you were that to imagine someone could turn on you was impossible? Your overconfidence was what caused you to be cast away - nothing but you."

"Shut up shut up SHUT UP!" Hidan gripped the scythe so hard the metal bent slightly under the force.

"Just die!"

…

…

…


	4. Past and the Present

Strange Love - Past and the Present

…

…

…

Hidan was the first to move. He leaned forwards, his feet glowing blue with chakra, then shot forth like speeding bullet. His three-bladed scythe lashed out wide, hoping to decapitate Shinki in a single strike.

Shinki side-stepped at the last moment, the scythe curving less than an inch from his face. He drew out his own weapon; a double-bladed long sword with serrated edges.

The two clashed, sword and scythe ringing as they ducked, blocked, parried, and struck out. To Hidan, it was as if he were reliving the past. He could close his eyes, and his body would carry out each movement, each parry, each thrust that would occur. This same situation had played itself out to the end hundreds of times in the past, with Hidan being the victor.

Hidan swept his weapon low, but the Shinki did something unexpected. With speed that defied logical limits, he kicked the flat blade of the scythe, and it flew wide. The follow-up sword stroke would have eviscerated his body if Hidan hadn't wrenched himself away from the swords trajectory.

"You're different from before." Hidan remarked, as he recovered his balance. He didn't want to admit it, but it seemed the times had changed; Shinki used to be one of the most agile warriors of Jashin, but still not as fast as Hidan. And now his speed was different – not just a little increase – it was on another level entirely. In a fight like this where each other's strength mirrored the other, that s difference should have been the deciding factor.

"No, Hidan. You're just the same."

But just as Shinki had changed, so had Hidan. For starters, he wasn't alone anymore. "Yah? Why don't you look behind you?"

Shinki twirled – and saw Kakuzu. The zombie man snuck behind Shinki as he and Hidan fought. Now his arms were extending, motes of chakra leaping around up his fingertip. Electricity filled the air with an acidic tang.

**'Lightning Release: False Darkness'**

Torrent upon torrent of white-hot energy focused into the tip of a single singularity– and lashed out with all the might of a spring hurricane. Lightning tore up ground in, tingeing the air with the tangt of bitter copper and the scent of burning ozone.

The massive blast caught Hidan and Shinki in its trajectory, and they were lost in the endless electric current.

A figure burst from the stream, enshrouded in a viscous blue aura.

Kakuzu looked up. It was Shinki. He had protected himself with some sort of protective technique. He breathed again, the chakra shifting in his body. That had been only one of his abilities – the power to freely use any element he wanted, an ability given to him from the hearts he had, each with a different affinity to an element. His whole body was a five slot element revolver, and each slotted the next one in his arsenal.

He held out his hands again, aiming high. This time his hands glowed crimson. It was the same technique he had just used this morning, an S-class level _ninjutsu._

**Fire Release: Burning Pain**

The red-hot inferno flooded into the air like a fiery windstorm, striking Shinki dead center. It held him in its heated grip, and seared his body with an immeasurable force of flame. And now the man fell, smoking, onto the ground.

Kakuzu looked to the man who was now a burning heap. Whatever protective move he had used had been blown away by the force of Kakuzu's technique. He almost wanted to yawn. This little battle hadn't even managed to raise his heart rate.

He turned to see smoke from the lightning techinque had dissipated, leaving an angry Hidan, burnt and with smoking holes in his clothes, stalking towards him.

"You could have at least given a warning!" Hidan raged. "That hurt!"

Kakuzu shrugged. "You're body is immortal." His eyes relayed another message. _'Deal with it.'_

"Well…at least you got the bastard." Hidan mumbled. He approached Shinki – and then stepped back, eyes widening in surprise as his clone lifted his head, smiling.

Pure light, bright and blinding, leaked from his body. It flooded everything, leaving not even a single shadow.

"Shit!" Hidan was flying blind, the light was too bright – and then he felt the serrated sword dig into his chest. "Son of a bitch!" He cried.

Kakuzu covered his own eyes, squinting against the evanescent light. Was this a blood-line limit? Or an illusion technique? In the radiant brightness, he could only make out the image of Hidan struggling…

Hidan clenched his teeth, grunting through the pain. Around him, everything was becoming clearer. Shinki's face, so like his very own, popped into his view – and the scalding pain in his chest began to stream everywhere into his body. His arms, legs, even his mind, making everything haze and waver. Strength began ebbing away from body, leeched by the blade.

"I told you there was no way you could win, brother." Shinki mocked, twisting the serrated blade further in as it cracked through ribs and tissue. "This is a ceremonial blade of Jashin – not even you are immune to it. It will seal your movements."

"Shut the hell up." Hidan spat out, before screaming again, the pain devouring all his senses.

He had lost, he realized. This traitor standing before him was blessed with the power of Jashin. Here he was, the object of all his hate, and yet he couldn't lift a single finger against him. It was utterly humiliating. Delirium began to seep into his mind, filling his thoughts with despair and hopelessness. It was because of the blade that he was feeling these emotions, but even knowing that...

He looked up, seeing nothing but the light. A prayer rested on his lips...

And in that all consuming light a dot of darkness emerged.

Shinki looked up, shocked, just in time to see a wriggling mass of black careening towards him. Kakuzu crashed into him and they tumbled backwards.

And the light faded, as everything came back into vision.

Tentacles morphed, fashioning themselves into blades, hundreds of them plunged down at once and perforated Shinki's body like a pincushion, leaving bloody fissures. He was like a rabid beast, tearing apart his prey.

Shinki gasped as each blade pierced him, his eyes filling with animosity. "Akatsuki is more formidable than I thought." He breathed out, the last air leaving him, blood dribbling from the corner of his lips.

"You can't even _begin_ to imagine." Kakuzu said, even as he tore apart the body beneath him.

"I will see you again…both of you..." Shinki shook, and a flash of light blinded Kakuzu for a moment. His body trembled once, the skin browning and muscles softening as he melted into mud. Kakuzu was left gripping the dirt.

A moment passed as Kakuzu processed the situation. He billowed his chakra like a wave, and retracted it. The man had used a jutsu to escape, and he was already from the area. A hoarse call brought his attention zipping back.

"Some help here?"

Kakuzu turned to see Hidan lying prostrate on the ground, sword still in his chest. The Jashinist was struggling to breathe. It was as if every breath he took he were inhaling up shards of glass.

"The enemy has escaped," he concluded, making his way towards Hidan. "_Kawarimi no jutsu_."

"No shit!" Hidan returned – then groaned, "...this fucking sword hurts like a bitch! It's doing something to me Kakuzu! I can't move…!"

Kakuzu came to a stop above Hidan, and looked down at the piteous Jashin believer. He bent low over his body, gripped the handle, and tore the blade free. It came out in a fountain of blood.

Hidan let out an ear-splitting scream.

"FUCK KAKUZU! That blade was edged! Don't just tear shit out like I'm a cow or something!"

Kakuzu inspected the blade, not bothering to look down, "and you're alive. Take it like the man you are. Or at least claim to be."

Then Kakuzu leaned down, brushing away the tattered remains of Hidan's clothes. "Where does it hurt?"

The question was unexpected. Hidan narrowed his eyes suspiciously.

"W-where you tore that sword out, dumbass. And it hurts everywhere too. I feel like a giant rabid panda ran me over." Hidan said before exhausting himself and lying compliant as Kakuzu proceeded to wipe away the blood with his hands and examine the wound. He dug a finger into the hole, eliciting another scream from Kakuzu.

"It pierced your heart." Kakuzu noted. The edges of the wound were an angry red, and black lines laced across the outer rim of the entry point. Fresh blood gushed out the wound with each pump of the heart. "It looks like there was some poison on the blade. Maybe similar to what was on that kunai earlier."

"Who cares…," Hidan groaned, "it was all messing up my chakra too…stupid ceremonial swords, I really should have broke them all when I was still at the temple…"

Kakuzu leaned further down, and after removing his mask, began to lick away the wound. Curious, he began drinking the copper blood even as it flowed.

Hidan puzzlement turned to astonishment as he saw Kakuzu's face for the first time. He _was_ good looking. Thick, pale lips the color of grave ash. A thin line extended from the sides of his mouth, cheek to cheek, as if someone had placed a knife there and slit his face wide open, but that also was laced with those black strings that covered his body. All in all, it came together in a mouth watering combination. He was so distracted for a moment that he nearly forgot the pain still ravaging his body.

"Huh..." Hidan said, reaching up with a finger to run over the smooth strings that criss-crossed his face, "your whole body is just put together like a rag doll, isn't it?"

When Kakuzu looked up to give him a glare, Hidan saw that besides his tongue, his mouth leaked little black tentacles, the same that burst from his body every now and then.

"Since I'm helping you, have the decency to stay silent."

Hidan obliged, and he lay his head back down, letting Kakuzu apply his full attention to his body. Kakuzu was surprisingly tender, his cool lips a pleasant feeling across his own constantly scalding skin. He remembered the experiment which made him immortal as it flit into his mind. Ever since then, he had run hotter than normal person.

Minutes passed, and the wound began to close at last. Now Hidan was beginning to feel something besides pain.

Kakuzu could sense it too, and slowly, his mouth veered off course from the wound, and began to roam other places. Places lower, and far more sensitive.

Hidan gasped as Kakuzu slid down and to the side a little, his mouth finding a taut nipple. It was a different feeling, as if a cube of ice were being slid across the sensitive surface, with thousands of little feelers – the things in his mouth – caressing him at once.

Kakuzu had reeled him in, and he was doing a fantastically wonderful job of caressing Hidan's body, sending him into a state of oblivion.

Hidan put up whatever pathetic resistance he could muster, then thought, _ah screw it all..._

"Hidan…" Kakuzu whispered into his ear, and he shuddered "I'm going to take you."

Kakuzu tugged at Hidan, and the rest of his burnt clothes flew off to the side, and his mouth was on Hidan's body with renewed force. He began licking upwards, trailing a path of healing saliva all over the injuries until his reached his neck and nibbled at the earlier wound.

_Shit_, Hidan thought in his delirious mind, _he's good._ It did occur to Hidan that maybe they shouldn't be doing this, especially when his sworn enemy still might be nearby, and especially since he was in a weak and vulnerable state, but he didn't want to stop. Not at all. Especially with Kakuzu's manhood hard against his thigh.

Kakuzu's teeth raked against Hidan's collarbone, his tongue darted out and lapping at salty skin, making Hidan moan from the sensation - the wet trails evoked pleasurable tingles from his groin, and he grew hard with need.

Hidan leaned his head, allowing Kakuzu more access to his throat.

"...Kakuzu," Hidan moaned. That was all he could say, all that was in his head at this moment.

Then Kakuzu was kissing him. Hidan reciprocated, his lips widening and dueling his partner, mapping out his teeth with his tongue. Kakuzu was delicious. He tasted of an unoffending strength, sweet yet bitter. His lips were like ice, cooling him down.

Kakuzu's knee pushed between Hidan's thighs, spreading them apart.

And then Kakuzu was in him – so hard, hot, and passionate that all words faded from his body and mind, until all that was left was this intangible feeling of pleasure that beat to rhythm of Kakuzu's every thrust. Hidan's breath hitched, his heart pumping anew and loud with every stroke in and out of his body.

Hidan was flipped around, a hand pushing him roughly against the ground. His erection scraped the floor, bringing him more pain, and he moaned all the more.

Kakuzu began to move again, slowly at first, gently, then increasing in speed. Each thrust was a new moment, a new feeling, a wave of ecstasy crashing into his body, building like a tidal wave that was going to sweep all of them away..

His hands gripped Hidan's hip and pumped away further, each drive of his body eliciting a muffled moan.

The tip of Kakuzu's cock continued to hit Hidans prostate, again and again, until both lost all sense of time. A minute passed, than an hour, and it blended to become one glorious blur, the only thing mattering was the feeling of this rod pummeling into him, sending sparks flying across my vision.

"Oh, _Jashin-sama_," Hidan moaned, feeling his impending orgasm, "…Kakuzu, more!"

As if he hearing his words, the tempo of thrusts increased. Kakuzu bit his shoulder, sending him into another fit of moans, and a thin stream of blood trickled down Hidan's warm, glistening skin.

A few more thrusts and Kakuzu came, and a hot stream filled Hidan's body, coating his insides. At the same time, the last of his thrusts sent Hidan over the precipice, and his wetness spattered against the ground.

Hidan gasp heavily, nearly having fainted from the intensity. "Well...that...was fun."

...

...

...

The first words that Kakuzu asked were, "So, explain to me what exactly is going on?"

Kakuzu's eyes bore into his uncomfortably. The way he stared was different from before; there was a carnal hunger that reflected in those eyes that Hidan hadn't seen before. Or maybe he had just never bothered looking for it. He couldn't say that he liked or disliked it. Ever since Hidan recovered, they spent the rest of the day and most of the night inspecting the ruins so he was able to keep his mind on other things, such as things not related to the new changing dynamic between him and Kakuzu.

They didn't find much, other than the weird symbols that Hidan had recognized as the symbol for the High Priest of Jashin. Kakuzu nodded when he heard that. Hidan guessed correctly that when they got somewhere safe, there was going be many, many questions asked.

They walked back to town just in time to see the sun rise, arguing the entire way, and parted ways as they passed through the entrance leading to the town.

Kakuzu had said he needed to talk to his contacts, and inform the rest of the network what new developments they had found at the ruins. Since he didn't think Hidan was going to be helping much, he set a meeting place and excused him for the rest of the day to do whatever he wanted.

Since he had free time, Hidan spent the afternoon around time, stopping by the local eatery and then shopping for some new clothes. Real clothes. None of that Akatsuki robe stuff. He laughed remembering the look of shock on the shop owners face as he walked in, all bloody with ripped clothes. A few gold coins calmed him down enough. At least Kakuzu was right about something. Money was a strong motivator indeed. He even got Kakuzu a new mask, as a special surprise. Then again, Kakuzu would turn up another robe out of nowhere. Hidan could swear he hid them in some easily reachable pocket dimension using some forbidden _jutsu_.

When he made it back to the inn, it was dusk, and Kakuzu sat at the lobby table, sipping his tea without a single care in the world apparently waiting for Hidan to arrive.

The sight of Kakuzu filled him with a tumble of emotions. Mostly lust, mixed along with some hate, jealousy, resentment and a smattering of something else he couldn't identify.

He wanted to kill him all over again. Preferably on some bed with some sort of kinky sex involved.

But shit, now wasn't the time. There was more urgent business to take care of. Killing this pretentious asshole could come later. Or sooner. He wondered if it violated the precepts of Jashin to not kill someone he was having sex with. He shook his head to clear his mind of such blasphemous thoughts.

Hidan sat at the seat across Kakuzu. He smiled, "Hey, I got you a new mask," and tossed him the slip of fabric he bought earlier.

Kakuzu held it up, and his face twisted in disgust.

"It has dog whiskers on it."

Hidan grinned. "I think it's pretty cute."

Kakuzu grunted.

To his surprise, Kakuzu didn't rip apart the mask like he thought he would. Instead, he slipped it into the sleeves of his robe.

Then the questions came.

"Well," Hidan began to explain, "I didn't think that bastard would come out of nowhere."

"Shinki, was it? He is your clone that you call your brother." Kakuzu's response was even and measured, almost as if he was reciting from a script. Hidan could see the cogs turning in his head, and for a brief moment wondered if there were tentacles in his head and if they clogged anything up. "And having someone like that hunting you, of course, is not information that you felt was important to share earlier."

Ugh. Dripping sarcasm.

"_Brother_ is just a term that we Jashinists call each other. We are all brothers in our hearts, and our father is Jashin. And yah, I didn't expect to see him." Hidan replied. "After all, since he's the high priest of the Jashin religion, he's not supposed to leave the temple. I guess he's pretty desperate."

"Hmm." More cogs turning. Hidan wondered just how much information he had gleaned from the little conversation he and Shinki had. "And what exactly was that white light?" Kakuzu asked, recalling the brightness that sprung from Shinki.

"The sacred art of Jashin. The Holy Fire. The First Sin. The Cleansing Flame. Lots of names, but from what I knew it was just some _ninjutsu_ passed down to high priest from high priest. It was supposed to be mine, but shit happened."

Cogs, cogs, cogs. Hidan could almost hear them creaking. Kakuzu was intent on trying to reason out something, and to someone who considered themselves so intellectual and aloof, there was only one thing that could make him think so much.

Emotions.

Ever since Kakuzu had seen Hidan again, something tugged at him. He'd been so long without feeling anything that even this slight ebb in his heart was more terrifying than the thought of losing all his wealth. Emotions made you make poor decisions. He had long thought that the only one left in his was anger, but he had proven himself wrong.

He set his teacup down. "I assume this man is after you. He escaped now, but he'll be back. They will always be back. Since he found us before, it probably won't be too difficult for him to find us again. Why did you say he was after you?"

"My immortality." Hidan shrugged his shoulders, as if it were nothing special.

"What do you mean?"

"The body I have is because of a number of experiments conducted on me by the Jashin priests. They had tried it thousands of times before, but failed. I was their first successful attempt. Because of that, the fools were so excited that they took my cells and tried to make a clone of me. Shinki was the 32nd attempt, and the first clone that survived. All the others died in their test tubes."

"I see."

"You know, you seem to be taking this in very easily. Not even shocked or anything."

Kakuzu smirked. "Clones and fringe religions aren't anything new. In my time I've seen much stranger things in this world.

"Bummer. I thought I was so cool here too."

"Then why do they need your body if they have your clone?"

Hidan shrugged again. "We're different. It worked on me, but not him. We're supposed to be genetically the same, but there is only one beast sexy Hidan in the world. Guess he's just jealous." Hidan tone darkened. "He'll be back. He won't leave me alone until he's got what he wants. He won't stop until we kill him."

"Why would he want to kill you though?" Kakuzu asked. Of course, motivations were important. If what Hidan said was true, then there was no point in this Shinki character coming after him, especially when he had everything that he wanted.

"The fire of Jashin. It burns away your body. That's why there is a new High Priest every few decades." Hidan said. "I was supposed to be the vessel to carry it, and to spread word of his Lord, but the idiot didn't know that. He betrayed me, but he was too stupid to do any research. So now he's probably dying, or will die soon. He doesn't want to die, so he's after me, the only person who can withstand the flames."

"Then that's on our agenda." Kakuzu stated. "Killing him, that is. Since he's desperate, he'll come to us. I don't want to waste time nor resources on something that will come to us. I'm also curious as to why the symbol of your religion is on those ruins. Do you know?"

Hidan shrugged.

"Then I will ask your _brother_ when he shows up."

"Sounds like a plan."

There was a brief silence as the two ninjas were lost in thought. Hidan's stomach took that moment to grumble. He turned around to find the waitress.

The waitress at the inn was too afraid to approach the duo. Hidan tapped his feet in annoyance as he wanted to order something warm to eat. Spare ribs. Yah, that sounded good. But the waitress was pretending to not see him, and it was becoming frustrating. Was all customer service in these backwater villages so horrible?

To his surprise, Kakuzu spoke up. Hidan had expected him to continue his moody displeasure, as if he were some angry, thirteen year old boy, and it shocked him that the next words to come out were not something another reprimand, but a soft, cajoling tone that asked a question.

"So it seems like you also are what others would consider 'messed up.'"

Hidan was taken back for a second. Or two. Or three. His head cocked, "Huh?"

Kakuzu lifted his teacup again. "Anyone who joins Akatsuki has personal issues of some sort. I'm not so naive that I don't recognize the situation that we are in, or our position. We are those rejected by the majority of society, or those that have goals deviant to what most others would believe."

It took Hidan awhile to wrap his mind around that. "Oh? And what makes you think that." He scowled, hating it when people assumed anything. Even when they were right.

"I've been in Akatsuki long enough that I've compiled information on most everyone. Itachi killed his entire clan, for reasons I have not yet uncovered. Was it jealousy, hate, or some other reason like the pursuit of power or wealth. Possibly some combination. Deidara rebelled against a strict society that could not accept his ideals or tolerate his methods, though he cares for his village in his own, twisted way. His methods proved so unsavory that he left his village and became a terrorist before joining Akatsuki."

"Sasori was born an unsurpassed master puppeteer that caved to the harsh training and neglect of his parents and village, killing his own people in the end to fulfill some pathetic void of need or want. Kisame left because he suffered from boredom, and being tethered to a village he didn't hold high in regards was insufferable to him. Orochimaru, another member that left before you came, was bent with hatred and had a morbid curiosity for forbidden _jutsus _so great that he was also hunted from his village for performing experiments in the name of expanding knowledge. Everyone else also has a similar reason, whether it was their upbringing or natural inclination. But I'm curious about you. I don't think i've ever met someone like you. What is yours?"

Hidan paused. Well, this had come out of nowhere. He was about 50% sure that in normal circumstances Kakuzu would never have asked. They had known each other for less than a week, and this was a beyond personal question. But there was no point in hiding anything. Unlike other renegade ninjas with sordid pasts that they wanted to hide, he was different. He had nothing to be ashamed of. Or to better phrase it, he had no shame at all. But more than that, for some reason he felt safe in talking to Kakuzu. The man was judgmental and rude, but there was something about him, the way that he objectively looked at matters that Hidan could appreciate. He wanted to spill his secrets to the man.

He cleared his throat, wondering where to begin. "I was born in a little village that bordered the Earth Country. It was called Yugakure."

Kakuzu nodded his head. "Yugakure? That village became a tourist destination years ago though."

Hidan laughed bitterly. "Yah. The idiots. My parents were the villages greatest ninja. In the last village wars, they slaughtered dozens and were the sole reason the village was left mostly unharmed. But after the war, the village council said they were tired of fighting, and in a few years time they transitioned to become a tourist spot. A tourist spot, for Jashin's sake! Did they not have pride as shinobi? Now they are nothing more than a hot springs resort town. Pathetic."

"The nearby countries realized that Yugakure was transitioning so they decided to take advantage for some things in the war and made a bunch of threats. The only way that they would forgive them for the lives they took during the ninja war was to give up their two greatest shinobi as sacrifices. My parents. And the village agreed. But they didn't say anything. They feared my mom and dad, and what they could do, so they drugged their food and killed them in their sleep. For the two greatest ninjas in the history of Yugakure to die like that...I was thirteen when that happened. After that I took my revenge, killing the entire council and then leaving the worthless dump behind."

Kakuzu rubbed his chin. It was a twist of the tale typical of many children. Children who lost their parents in the war would grow up for revenge. Especially those with blood line limits. They were so feared when peace came, that even though most wanted to be left alone, fate had decided a much crueler path for them. "When did you encounter Jashin?"

"Ahh…well lets see, that was...after I left. I was free to do whatever I wanted. No hunter-nins were after me, because the village had no more. And then I encountered a priest of Jashin. He was a warrior, and brought me back to the temple. I was a prodigy, and I was the first successful one to become immortal. But I hated living there. You had to be celibate. Celibacy. Can you imagine that? No sex! Priests were missing out on 99.9% of the joys in life. It wasn't like they weren't doing the dirty behind closed doors, but most of them were old men. Not my type at all. And I could do a much better job spreading the will of Jashin-sama out here than I can cooped up in that cage." Hidan shrugged.

"Then why is this man named Shinki after you?" Kakuzu asked, leaning in closer.

"Well," Hidan snorted at this point, "After my clone was made, they sped up his age process, and he looked just like me, no surprise. I was going to be the next High Priest, since the last one died. Hopefully I would have been the last one. Long story short, the little shit backstabbed me during the coronation ceremony to receive the power of Jashin."

"What power is that? That light?"

"Yah." Hidan answered with a bit of disgust. "He always hated me because I was stronger than him. The jealous little shit. I didn't think he'd leave the temple though."

"Why is that?"

"He's bound to the place by duty. He can't leave unless the other priests let him. Who's going to lead the chants and ceremonies anyways? He wants me now, because he was unable to complete the immortality _jutsu_ that was done to me. Well, he can't have it! And he's weaker when he leaves the temple grounds. The farther he is, the less of his power he can use. Why are you asking? Are you interested in my powers? There have been countless people lusting over Jashin's powers, only to be offered as sacrifice." There was a hint of a threat in Hidan's tone, lurking beneath the words.

"I'm not interested in your powers or whatever immortality _jutsu_ it is that you have."

Hidan blinked once, then twice. "That's a first. I've had to kill almost all the people I've met since I escaped from the temple of Jashin. They tried to take me in my sleep, or when my defenses were down. What did they think to do with me? Cook me up in some stew and gain my strength? It's not like it'll make you young or something. Idiots."

He sighed. It was getting tiring; killing everyone he met who knew his secret. The greed of people was insane and consuming. Greed was a cardinal sin after all, and only Jashin could free those who lusted after his power. He remembered the first person he had encountered since escaping the temple. She was an old woman, a retired grandma that rescued his drifting body from the tide after he had jumped off the cliff to escape the legions of zealots after him. He had stayed at her little hut for the few days, as his body recovered from months rotting away in the ocean. She had asked for his story, and he had told her, thinking she was a kind old lady. That night he found she had poisoned his food with a hallucinogenic drug, but his body had rejected it, waking up in the middle of the night to find her hovering over him with a butcher's cleaver.

Her death had been bloody. He had been on the lam since.

"For us renegade shinobi, there are ways to extend lives, whether it's from a special ability or a forbidden technique, just like whatever _jutsu_ was used on you. I'm over one hundred years old." Kakuzu continued, "Taking hearts one after another, living day after day, my body stopped aging. In this world, you are not truly unique."

Hidan stared goggle eyed at Kakuzu. Then he laughed, "well shit, you really are just an old man!"

Kakuzu mulled over the story. He'd heard of the Jashin sect; a group of insane prophets and believers that lived on some island and waited for their god to come back to deliver everyone to a higher plane of existence. He'd thought they were just a bunch of kooky old bats or rejects brainwashed into believing some idiot with a book and a loud mouth, like most other religious sects, but it appeared they had powers under their command that weren't to be trifled with. And here in front of him was living, non-dying proof.

Hidan has surprised him. He didn't expect the blond to be some open to about his past, or the source of his powers. No one in Akatsuki would have done that without something equal in return. They probably wouldn't have revealed anything at all, in the case that it would reveal some weakness or vital point that could be used against him. Any information gleaned would come from years of subterfuge and spies and counterspies. The boy hadn't asked for his background. He probably didn't care. Had the blond lied to him? …No. He could sense instinctively that he was telling to truth. In a way, it was rather refreshing. Speaking to someone openly, without having to read between the lines was in its own way even more of a battle of wits than having to.

As he thought it over, Hidan had grown tired of waiting for their order to be taken, and stopped up to the girl that was behind the counter, who gave a little yelp.

Hidan frowned. It's not like he was going to kill her. How could anyone be scared of his catchy and oh-so irresistible mug? His platinum hair that shimmered in the light and his tone, lean body shaped just right. He knew he looked good, after all. After placing an order, he stormed back to his table to see Kakuzu thinking to himself. Was that all the man did? Think? How boring.

"So where are we going to go now?" Hidan said as he set himself into his seat, "I don't mind headed straight to where Shinki is and killing the bastard."

Kakuzu shook his head. "No. I'm going to do some research first. Especially on the material composition of this blade." Kakuzu tapped a bag that was leaning against his chair. It was the serrated blade that had disabled Hidan. "I haven't seen a weapon like this before. Do you know anything about it?"

Hidan shook his head. "Those are ceremonial blades used in rituals. Only the high priest is allowed to use them."

Kakuzu nodded. "Then I'm going to examine it so there aren't any surprises. To do that, we'll visit Edo first. I have a contact there. I still plan on killing this Shinki character. He's stepped on my toes too much for me to ignore."

Edo? That sounded familiar. Where had Hidan heard that before? "Oh! That place is near your hometown isn't it? Aren't you a renegade there? Seem's like unsafe territory to me."

"Yes. I still have people there loyal to me."

"I don't mind the side trip. Isn't there some sort of mission we're on now or something. Not like I care, but I don't want you to blame me if you get spanked by your daddy-leader later." Hidan said, eliciting a scowl from the stoic ninja.

"We have a few months. I'm in no hurry, and I think we'll find much more information when we see your brother again." Kakuzu leaned in until he was an inch away from Hidan's face. The Jashinist could almost taste him. "...Insult me again and I'll spank you so hard you won't be able to walk tomorrow."

Hidan smiled. He'd like that, and all that the spanking would entail. "I didn't know you were into that kind of kink."

Just then, the waitress interrupted to two and set their order in front of them before hightailing away.

"Eat up." Kakuzu said, "we'll stay here the night and leave at dawn the next morning."

As the two began to eat, they resumed glaring at each other, the heavy auras of chakra pushing at each other.

This was shaping up to be a promising adventure.

...

...

...

When dusk came, Hidan retreated to his room. His _own_ room. Kakuzu had been too thrifty to rent two rooms, but Hidan couldn't bear the thought of spending the night with him. It wasn't as if he didn't have his own money, so he rented his own room for the night.

His body still plastered with dry blood, he decided that it was a good time to go to the _onsen_ at the inn, a steaming outdoor pool of water that would do wonders to his sore muscles. Though he was from Yugakure, there were some things that he couldn't hate about it, such as its hot springs. He used to love it when his mom and dad would bring him together to local _onsen_, and they would spend the night there.

But those days were long gone, and Hidan didn't want to dwell on them. Being reminded of how happy he once would only make him realize how sad he was now. So he picked up a towel and headed to the back entrance where the springs were.

As he slipped into the water, his head leaning back in peace as the hot bubbly waves rocked him, he heard the sound of someone slipping into the water near him. It was probably just another guest, not that he cared enough to look. Though it was late enough at night that no one should have been out here. The steam was on his face, warm and inviting like a lovers caress. This was pure _bliss_.

"You look like you're enjoying yourself."

The voice startled Hidan so much he almost feel into the pool. He caught himself in time to see Hidan looking at him, his body just inches away.

"Oh for Jashin's sake!" Hidan exclaimed. "Can't I get some damn peace and quiet every now and then!"

Kakuzu looked at him with a muted expression. His mask was off, and Hidan noted all the little features he didn't see earlier. Kakuzu had ear length hair that was the color of charcoal. His normally pale white eyes were the softest shade jade he had seen.

"Your eyes." Hidan said.

"What about my eyes?"

"They're green. I thought they were white." Hidan noted. "Not that I...uh...care...or anything like that. Just wondering."

Kakuzu chuckled, and the sound of his laugh sent a shiver through Hidan. The zombie man was in a disgustingly good mood at the moment. Hidan wanted him to go back to being a stoic asshole. It was much easier to ignore him then.

"Green is my natural color. White is when my guard is up. Black for when I'm using a _jutsu_."

"Why are you telling me this? I thought shinobi were all up in their secrets." Hidan asked.

Kakuzu shrugged. "I don't know." And he didn't really know. Things like that were secrets that kept ninja alive, but he was calmed down enough at this moment, with the water running around him, that we didn't care. Or maybe he wanted Hidan to know. To know that he believed him enough that he could let his guard down near him.

"Well," Hidan said, "it's nice. Green's nice." It was more than nice; it was the most beautiful shade of green he had ever seen. He wanted to stare into those eyes forever.

The two sat in peace, quiet, yet acutely aware that they were close to each other, letting the water soothe their muscles.

After an hour, Hidan had decided he had enough, so he rose up out of the water. He draped a towel around his wet waist, but not before giving Kakuzu a sneak peak of his full body. He grinned. He hoped the zombie boy would take a cold shower after this.

As he stepped out of the pool, he heard Kakuzu following him. Apparently he had decided he had enough too.

When Hidan opened the door to his room, he was surprised when his partner followed him in.

"What are you doing in my room?" Hidan asked, as Kakuzu stepped over to a closet and tossed on a robe. Hidan tried to keep his eyes firmly glued to Kakuzu's face, but couldn't resist as his eyes drifted lower over his hard body, and the way the robe clung to every sinew and muscle.

Kakuzu spared him a glance. "This is my room." He responded.

Hidan froze. "Ah, damn." Kakuzu was right. Hidan's room was on the second level. This was the first floor. He had walked back into their room without knowing it. "Oh...well uh...oops...I'll just go back to mine..." He straightened his back. This was an everyday mistake. He refused to be embaressed by it.

"Stay."

That single word stopped him as his hand reached for the door handle.

"I'm not in the mood for sex, Kakuzu." Hidan said.

"I'm tired. I want to rest for the night. The day has been long. Just stay."

Hidan blinked. He had his own room, his own futon. It had a better view, and better air circulation to. And there was no zombie pervert there. Maybe it was because it was already past midnight, or maybe it was because he was just too tired, and he couldn't think straight, but when Kakuzu asked him to stay, Hidan couldn't think of a single valid reason not to. And that futon that Kakuzu had laid out on the floor was looking mighty comfortable.

He stepped back into the room. "I don't have a robe."

"Then sleep naked."

"You'll try to rape me."

"I won't"

And Hidan believed him. He had no reason to, but he just _did_.

So when Kakuzu laid back on the futon, Hidan joined him. The blanket was barely big enough for the both of them, and they had to squish together a little. He somewhat expected the hand that reached over his body and pulled him close, but when it didn't go lower, he realized that Kakuzu hadn't lied. He was really just damn tired. So with Kakuzu spooning against his back, it really did feel good. Kakuzu was like a giant pillow. And since he was hogging all of the pillow, Hidan felt obligated to pull the man's arm out and use it as a head rest. It felt good, like on a hot day when you were sick, you would put the pillow in the fridge and it would come out all cool and comfy. That was what it felt like.

"You're warm." Kakuzu whispered in his ear.

"Yeah."

"Feel's good."

"Yeah."

"You smell good too."

"Oh shut up."

"Good night, Hidan."

"Good night, Kakuzu."

And they fell asleep.

...

...

Hidan was tired of lifting the sack of goods and his scythe at the same time. "Fuck it. Fuck it all!" He said, tossing the giant duffel bag onto the ground. Gadgets spilled out as if it were some deflating balloon leaking water. It was one of Hidan's little weak points. He loved buying trinkets from vendors. Painted fans, toys, charms, even some sticks of grilled chicken mixed in there to form a chaotic mess. Buying stuff was fine; what he hated was carrying it all for over half a hundred miles.

Kakuzu had stared in silent wonder at the delicious platinum blonde as they strolled past the main street of town. Hidan had been so preoccupied stopping and looking at every stall and store that they spent the better part of the day buying useless paraphernalia that no local in their right mind would have glanced at. There had been almost a childlike wonder on the face of the man that could easily kill someone without blinking. And rape their corpse afterwards for good measure. It was a side he hadn't seen before, and he'd never admit it, but it was cute. Disturbingly so. It probably stemmed from a life of being cooped in a little island.

In fact, Kakuzu had found himself thinking a lot of things about Hidan lately. The way a dimple appeared on cheek when he gave his trademark grin, or the way that his hair caught the sun so that it seemed like a sheet of light, or how his skin was so warm it heated up the air around him. He was Kakuzu, a man with his own sordid past, that hadn't felt much in the way of emotions for over fifty years. And here was this man, this maddeningly idiotic backwater ninja from some remote island with amazing powers that made him angry one moment then filled him with lust the next. Base emotions, yes, but it was something that Kakuzu hadn't felt in awhile.

And worst of all, he couldn't kill the man.

"You should have stopped after that man tried to sell you bracelets." Kakuzu whispered. "I'd be glad to impart you some trade secrets if you would suspend such rash dispossession of your own money."

Hidan turned to face him. "They were buy two, get one _free_! Free! What a deal!" He'd never seen a variety of bracelets like that before. He had wanted them all.

Kakuzu snorted. And this was the man that was trying to lecture him on material wealth. "You could have gotten those for a tenth of the price. The old man was playing you for a fool. And you are a fool. Who buys twenty bracelets?"

_Only an idiot_, he thought.

Hidan's eyes widened in outrage, "Well fuck you!" He turned around and began stomping backwards.

"Where are you going?"

"To kill the old man." He stated.

Kakuzu sighed. Why did he expect this? Hidan was a man with open emotions that he would act on. "It's a little too far now. Almost sunset. We'll make it to the Water Country soon if we keep up our pace. You can take your revenge when you return."

Hidan grinned. "Good idea." He could always do it the next time he had to stop by that little town. Thinking back, it had been a bad idea to buy so many things, but he simply couldn't resist. It would probably take them another day or two to make it to another town where Kakuzu had said he needed to meet with a contact from his own village.

It was strange. Ever since the ruins, Hidan had found Kakuzu's behavior becoming less and less infuriating. He found himself listening to Kakuzu's advice more, as if following his orders were almost natural. Usually he'd be rebelling at every turn. He still grew mad, but it wasn't the type that made him want to kill-kill him. It was the type that made him want to kill-him-and-then-rape-his-body. Frankly, it pissed him off to no end that he wanted someone so badly right now, no matter how attractive Kakuzu was to him.

No matter if he was a _heathen_ that didn't worship Jashin-sama, as he should be.

No matter if he had strong, contoured muscles and abs more defined with his.

No matter if his wide chest was cold, just the right temperature he liked to press against his too hot skin.

No matter if he liked the size of his manhood or his technique, no matter the taste of his body or his…

Hidan caught himself before the drool slipped from his mouth. Fuck! _See? _It was aggravating. It was just a temporary fascination. That must be all there was to it.

He caught Kakuzu giving him a raised brown.

"What the fuck are you looking at, heathen!"

As the pair furthered into the forest, the sun loomed at the horizon signaling nighttime. A twig cracked in the background.

Hidan was oblivious, his mind thinking about how he wanted to have sex, but for the Kakuzu who had racked up thousands of miles of solo travel, it was something he had heard hundreds of times before. Bandits.

"Three o' clock." Kakuzu said aloud, his words pulling Hidan from his thoughts.

Hidan should have expected something. After all, he'd been injured more in the past few days journeying with Kakuzu than he'd been for the last few years. Javelin wounds, shuriken wounds, fire burns, knife wounds, he was getting sick of being caught unaware. So he was half expecting something as he turned, giving off a small "_huh_?", just as the feathered arrow lodged itself in his throat.

"Urgh!" Hidan choked. Blood streamed down his chest as he reached up and snapped the arrow in two, pulling the halves out. Fuck! It was serrated, sharp barbs lining the edge! Fucking _hell! Why was everything serrated these days!_ Someone was going to pay! Tossing the broken arrow to the ground, he flung himself to the side as another flurry of arrows whistled towards him. He dodged them all, each of the arrows thunking into the tree behind him. He looked up to see Kakuzu catching the arrows with his bare hands, his eyes glancing down at him as if saying, '_amateur'_,

Hidan flipped him the finger.

With a surge of chakra boosting him, Hidan righted himself and sped towards the location of the arrows. Bursting from the brush, he heard the scattered cries as the bandits ran away, not anticipating the change in development. There were five total, and they ran off in different directions, having previously decided on a route of escape if their initial assault failed. They had messed with the wrong people.

"Sons of bitches! You're not even worth sacrificing to Jashin-sama!" Hidan screamed. He leaned back and took aim, flinging his scythe, sending it careening forwards like a giant three bladed throwing dagger. The ends embedded themselves in the back of one fleeing bandit. One down. He chased another, catching up in the breadth of a second. A normal human's speed was incomparable to a ninja, especially one like Hidan. He took the man by the neck, and looked down to see that this one had a arrow pouch strung across his back. Serrated arrows. His eyes filling with bloodlust, he tore out the man's throat with his bare fingers.

Turning around, he sensed silence, and concluded that Kakuzu had taken care of the other three.

Just as he thought that, he saw the other ninja emerging, his shirt stained with a few scattered drops of blood. Hidan's on the other hand was caked in red, from the arrow that had struck him.

"Fuck, Kakuzu! You could have given me a warning!" Hidan said, looking down at his ruined shirt, "I don't have any more clothes to change into! Shit!"

"I did warn you. Pay attention."

Hidan narrowed his eyes. His breath was shaky, as the excitement of the killings spurred him on. Adrenaline coursed through him, sending his body temperature red-hot. "You've been getting on my nerves so much lately, you know that?"

Kakuzu leaned nonchalantly backwards. "The feeling is mutual."

"There it is! That fucking holier-than-thou attitude. Who the hell do you think you are? There's only one believer here, heathen, and that's me. So drop the attitude before I drop you in your grave."

"The one with an attitude here isn't me. You only perceive an attitude because of your incompetence." A vein bulged angrily on Hidan's forehead. "What kind of amateur gets hit by arrows from _bandits_?"

"Oh, is that how it's going to be? Incompetent? We'll see who's incompetent when you and all your hearts are ripped open."

"You wouldn't be able to kill me if there were a dozen of you, Hidan. You need to learn to shut up sometimes."

"You know what? I think I'm going to kill you. Right now." Hidan rushed forwards, his body shrouded with chakra, his pace so quick a faint afterimage appeared.

And like the arrow, he should have expected what was coming next. A burst of black, thick tentacles gripped him a foot away from Kakuzu, lifting him and holding him in place.

Kakuzu brought the lithe blond closer, "If you want to kill me Hidan, you'll have to do better than act like a rash ninja still training in the academy," he breathed out. Hidan smelled mind-bendingly delicious at the moment. The tang of copper with the warm, salty breeze of sweat.

Hidan grinned, even as the black mass tightened on him. "If you want to kill me Kakuzu, you'll have to do better than act like an excited teenage boy on his first date." He reached down with his hand and gripped Kakuzu's manhood through the thin fabric of his pants. "See? You're this excited already."

Kakuzu's body shook as Hidan gripped him. "Why do you insist on angering me at every chance you get?"

"Because you're a fucking prick." Hidan spat.

"If you were anyone else I'd have killed you a hundred times over by now." Kakuzu warned, his breath dangerously low.

"Kill me if you can. It'll take a stronger man than a weakling like you to do it." Hidan mocked, then cried out as a kunai sank in and out of his gut.

"You really are good at pushing my buttons."

Hidan smirked. "Let's fuck."

And without another word, Hidan was flipped onto the ground, the tentacles releasing him and retracting as if they were never there.

His clothes were ripped off. Pants, shirts, everything torn off in a second. Hard, cold hands roamed his body, his stomach, his chest, feeling everywhere. "Take off your fucking mask, for jashin's sake!" Hidan cried out, his own hands reach down to pull Kakuzu closer.

There was a slight hesitation. "I've already seen what's underneath." Kakuzu looked up for a moment, his eyes reflecting in his own, and then it was off, and he was kissing him with a passion. His lips were everywhere, the crook of his throat, the contours of his cheek. And everything tasted like the warm sun, sweeter than honey.

Hidan bit back a moan as Kakuzu gripped his hard length with his calloused hand, rubbing it with a friction and tightness that felt as if he were entering him. His other hand fisted Hidan's hair, keeping the ninja in place.

And then Kakuzu stood up, the rest of his clothes peeling off and thrown away with abandon. Hidan smirked, and sat up, close, his lips just brushing against the head of Kakuzu's arousal. Hidan reveled in the feeling of keeping a man like Kakuzu waiting. His tongue darted out and he slowly licked the head, enjoying watching the strong, cold man before his shiver. And then he engulfed Kakuzu, his mouth stretched to its limit.

It tasted bittersweet; the musk of Kakuzu was the grave and the cold allure of strength.

"You like that don't you?" Kakuzu asked, his hips thrusting gently into Hidan's mouth.

Hidan answered him with a moan, the extra stimulation sending a jolt through Kakuzu's body. His mouth was warm, almost scalding to the touch just like Hidan was, and Kakuzu reveled in him. He could feel the Hidan's warmth seeping into his body, giving him a quickness he hadn't felt for in ages.

And then he was out of Hidan's mouth and his body covered Hidan's again. Why was the platinum haired man's body so _warm_?

Kakuzu feathered him with kisses. This was the one time he could afford to be gentle with ninja, caressing hid smooth skin.

"You're blood tastes good." Kakuzu said, as his lips closed around his throat where the arrow had pierced. "Have I told you that before?" In the back of his mind, Kakuzu knew something was changing about him. He was normally not one to talk, but it seemed something changed every time they had sex, something he couldn't describe.

Hidan wrapped his arms around Kakuzu's neck, his words coming out in hitched moans, "shut…the…fuck…up, are you…some…vampire…or some…shit…uhn!" He cried out just as Kakuzu entered him. "Fuck! Jashin-sama!"

Kakuzu plunged into the body before him, his eyes closed in ecstasy as the tight ring of muscles gripped him. Hidan was crying out to his god again and again intermixed with his own name, his nails digging lines across his back, and it was driving him further insane.

They developed a rhythm, pushing against each other yet holding on tightly. Kakuzu withdrawing out, and thrusting in his whole length each time, brushing the center of Hidan's pleasure until the bringing them closer to the precipice.

And then Hidan let out one final cry as he started his release, shots of warmth shooting onto his stomach and face. Kakuzu followed soon after, his seed flowing deep inside Hidan's body.

Hidan's chest rose, taking in deep breaths as Kakuzu lay against his skin, taking in his warmth. He turned his head to the side a little, and saw the body of the bandit he'd killed a few feet away.

He frowned.

He hated cleaning up.


End file.
